OMG, WTF! where did i get myself into....??

[lions-tambua.livejournal.com]

Hi Folks...

After quite an while, i finally have some time again to read and post *sighs*
stressted months....

Iam now sitting in an new department, an new country, new co-workers...
i dont know if this is NORMAL here.. (iam sitting in slowakia now, just a few miles east from austria (where i now live again))

i mean... all my co-workers are at LEAST 22 years old (the youngest) goes up to 35 years.
what do they have in common ? (ok, beside working in this department ?)
ok, how should you guess, they are ... i cant find the right word for it. CHILDISH wouldnt fit exactly. babyish maybe... no.. still not.

There are two calls in the ACD waiting to be picked,
3 of the co-workers are standing around chatting and joking around.
2 are checking some comics or other website (ebay, gmx)
2 are playing with plasticine, they look at the ACD and call (in slowak) "dwa calli, dwa calli! eyey dwa calli! dwa calli!" *growls*
1 has to comment each mail he reads and deletes with, "hurraaayy!"
our "Team-Leader debuty" (he also plays with plasticine) surfs the web the whole time and phones with his wife.
another one has to comment each call he takes with (also in slowak, just translated so you know what its about), "Oh... Customer has problem ?? AWWWWWWWWWW!!! really ? AWWWWWWWWW!! need replacement ? AWWWWWWWWWW.. AWWWWWWWW! that so sad, AWWWWWWWWWWWW!" *claws the desk*

GOSH!!! can ANYONE PLEASE just SHOOT ME!?
*headdesk*
i mean, they are GROWN UPS! iam not the kind of 100% serious type myself, i love to joke around sometimes and do stupid, childisch or other crazy things, ok... but there ARE borders! when iam at WORK, iam beeing pay to DO that work! not do make fun out of everything and everyone *growls angrily*

(and i thought our CUSTOMERS are annoying)

Ack! Fetch the L.A.R.T.!

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

I quote:

"User is being prompted for a password when trying to enter into a mainframe pc..."

I'm too tired to be amused...

Is it too much to ask?

[major-error.livejournal.com]

We all have out support point-and-say-WTF! moments...
Using the subject line for the body of the message, general mangling of the English language, and other fairly repetitive things like that.
What really munges my stack is when users call/email/walk-up and state that "they have a problem, can you come and fix it?"
Yeah. Let me get right on that...

Is it so much trouble to tell me what the problem is before I get to your desk? I could understand if it were some sort of personal issue, but I'm not that sort of support professional. No. We're discussing computers, and everything generates an error, has a symptom or setting. I've worked in this capacity long enough to understand luser-speak, so tell me what's going on. It helps.

No, really. It does. Honest!

There's nothing I hate more than to show up at someone's desk only to realize that I needed something else to address the issue, be it a screwdriver, The Tech-Hammer™, a floppy, or a priest....it just makes everyone irritated when I have to run off and phone the Vatican when I could have easily fired up an imaged spare I have sitting at my desk.

Cutting off the leeches

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

Everyone has them. The users who call and call and call and CALL for utterly trivial stuff. Timewasting bonebrains of the first water. People who don't understand "We are not providing you support any longer. Stop calling us."

As a corporate helpdesk, we can cut these people off (both phone and email) and direct them to their supervisor for all future interactions. Well, when I say 'cut off', I really mean "One of the low-level managers gets stuck dealing with them", but for the people on the phones it's the same effect.

We're somewhat fortunate to have this system in place, even if it's a little flawed. But it could be a lot better. What's your favorite way to tell certain individuals they won't be receiving any more beersupport?

(no subject)

[mightyj.livejournal.com]

Luser:  "Is there a problem with the server?"
Me:  "Could you be more specific?  What problem are you having?"
Luser:  Gets flustered because I want more info.
Me:  "I have 35 servers.  Which server are you having a problem with?"
Luser:  "Nevermind"

Turned out to be the SQL database that our SQL admin has been trying to fix all day.

(no subject)

[kuang.livejournal.com]

'I was just wondering, is there something wrong with the server?'

Ahh, that age old battlecry of the technically challenged who need to impress the even-less technically clued up managers hovering within earshot. This particular one came from $Luser who is renowned for being a muppet of the highest order when it comes to anything that requires some degree of clue. You can actually witness your words fly over her head like pretty bluebirds when the sentence contains such challenging terms as 'printer' or 'keyboard'. You wouldn't trust her with anything more technical than a pencil, and even then you wouldn't sharpen it.

Me - We have around 40 of them - which one in particular were you concerned about?..
$Luser - Well we're having lots of problems up here and we thought the server might be broken


I swear that these people think the IT room resembles Stonehenge on Midsummer's eve - all the techy druids draped in ribbon cables, dancing around the glowing monolith known simply as Ye Server, dedicating chants to the deity Tor-Valds and sacrificing USB memory sticks to the Gods of Static..


Me - Such as?
$Luser - Well I can't get my email and $Otheruser can't print.
Me - *taptap* You can't get your mail because you're still using the wrong password, even after I told you yesterday and $Otheruser rang me a few minutes ago and can now print perfectly. Anything else?
$Luser - So the server is ok then?
Me - Yes. The server is fine. Goodbye.

*thud*


***EDIT***

I hadn't read the previous post before writing this one. There's some some of synchronicity at work there.. either that, or all Lusers really ARE as bad as each other :)