No I cant give you your hard drive back.

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

You brought your machine in for a warranty repair. The company that makes your machine sent me a new drive under warranty. Now, under that warranty, I have to send your old drive back to them within X numbers of days, or I get charged an insane sum of money. No, there is no way for me to get around this. No, I cannot just send them back some random hard drive. Sorry.

(no subject)

[inahandbasket]

After I told someone they didn't need their drivers CD for their Optiplex I got this back:

"There's no need to be snarky! Just so you know, I had Software Instruction in the 70s."

... woah.
Mmmm kay then. And that applies how?

Wow.

[darkrose.livejournal.com]

From a customer via our sales department:

----------------------
Hi,

Your email states:

"The coupon code will expire on Thursday February 28, 2008"

Is this correct?

---------------------

Would it be snarky of me to suggest that the Sales guys tell him that we just arbitrarily make up dates all the time for our coupon codes and he should just ignore what the e-mail said?

Are people really that stupid?

You think you're so smart

[antikythera.livejournal.com]

This is for all the techs out there who sometimes need tech support themselves.

I really appreciate it when I'm calling someone else for support and I can tell that they're thinking and asking systematic problem-solving questions. I know that I'm perfectly capable of missing obvious details even though I work with computers for a living too. In some cases, calling tech support is like getting a fresh eye to look at the problem and point out what I looked over.

If I start asking you the basic questions (did you install the drivers, what version of Quicktime do you have, etc.) and you tell me that you've been working with computers for umpteen years, I will not skip the easy questions and move on to the more advanced ones. I don't know what you've already tried. If you know how this stuff works, you could possibly give me a list of the things you have already tried, so that I know where to start. (I think this is all symptomatic of someone who works with computers but has never had to do any kind of support or troubleshooting themselves. We're all very specialised types of bees in this business.)

Claiming to be an expert does not impress me, and just makes you look worse if it turns out your problem is something really obvious. :)

I say A or B. You give me F.

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

Argh... I leave a nice note with both my internal email and my blackberry number on it so you can contact me directly about the issue I came to fix. You decide to call back to the call center who is neither within a mile or two of you, cannot come back out to your desk, and cannot even look at your system as it is a cheap Gateway (256mb RAM!!!) that does not partake in our domain goodness. Now there's a note in the ticket that you called back for status and I get the email saying I need to hop over there post-haste.

Gah!

I think I'll wander over - eventually. There is, of course, a refreshing stop in the little room with bad acoustics that takes precedence. ;-)

I think I might even have to copy.paste this into the work log..... Bwahahahahaha..... !!!!
------------------------
Ok, ok...  so I might have to fall on my screwdriver here. Apparently they tried to call, but my pinko commie blackberry refused to ring. *grumble*

but.. if I thought the Celeron 3.2 w/ 256 was bad, the real system in question was worse... an old Vectra PIII w/ 128... AND WIN98!

(no subject)

[ptstech.livejournal.com]

Über-boss had a project due the next morning. ÜB also has a kid. Kid LOVES keyboards. Kid had access to said keyboard w/o ÜB noticing. After kid gets put to bed, ÜB goes back to desk to finish project only to discover kid had entered the magic combo Ctrl + Alt + left arrow key.

Suffice to say, ÜB showed for the presentation fully prepared.

And with a stiff neck.

Hilarity ensues here.

(no subject)

[slayne-souls.livejournal.com]

MSNBCmustbiteme.com

[10001110101.livejournal.com]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23283402/

For those without the time to check it: An MSNBC article lauding consumers 'fighting back' against horrible customer service. Would anyone care to place a friendly wager how many of these "horror stories" BEGAN with the customer calling and cursing out the evil, nefarious helldesk ape simply because they had no better way to deal with their feelings of frustration? One story talks about a gentleman who got all butthurt because Apple wouldn't provide warranty service for a recently purchased Macbook with evidence of "damage from spilled liquid". Another talks about the "brave" and "heroic" tale of a 76-year old woman going into a Comcast branch office armed with a hammer and destroying equipment in the reception area because, according to the article, they "failed to install her service properly".

Maybe we should start a blog. Say "Asshole_technophobe_lusers_who_mistreat_support_workers_must_die.com"

NOTE: I don't work for any of the companies listed in the article. Hell, I don't even LIKE most of the companies mentioned in the article. That doesn't mean the poor saps who work there don't deserve to be treated with the same respect the customers are so stridently BAWWWing about.

x-posted to my personal journal.

Holy Shit!

[ravenofdreams.livejournal.com]

Seen in the Neowin forums today, the worst hard drive splort I have ever seen. Check out the pics behind the cut - they're so worth it. And my question to you, O Fellow Techs, is how long did this take to happen? And how long before the luser noticed?( Pictures of Pure Amazing )

Evidently it's a Quantum Fireball CR 8.4 AT, out of some flavor of Dell with a PII in it. Wowch.