That's why they call it "changing your password"...

[sami-rdwd.livejournal.com]

I got a call this morning at work from a customer who had gotten an e-mail saying her password was going to expire within the next few days. I thus walked her through the steps of changing her password.
It said to enter old password into said box - she did so.
When she got to the "new password" box, she asked "Can it be the same as my old password?"
Me:*blink* "...No..."
Her:"Oh, so it has to be changed at least a little bit..."
Me:"Yes, at least a little bit..." I really wanted to say "That's why they call it a new password" but I was nice.

"Must not be petty" is my new mantra

[harry-whodunnit.livejournal.com]

You've been using someone else' login for the last nine months. This is A) against the employee code of conduct, which could potentially get you fired. B) illegal, given that we both work for the government. C) dumb. The sysadmin just cancelled that user's account because she left and now, since you never bothered to arrange for access to the applications you need, you're locked out.

When your friendly neighbourhood helpdesk tech offers to sort it out for you as soon as he can and without reporting you, the correct response is "Thanks", not "Unacceptable".

Bah, users.

What's that saying about a lack of planning on your part not constituting an emergency on my part???

[no-smorking.livejournal.com]

So, at my company I create the network accounts and mailboxes, among other things. Right now I just got handed a major project that needs documentation prior to implementation (it's already in pilot) and the holdup for implementation is.... documentation. No pressure!

I also coordinate user moves and setups. Last night right before I walked out the door I got handed eight moves that they want done all on the same day (with two people on my team besides me, that's not happening, since we're also responsible for floor IT support for about 500 users). Of course two of these users have networked, restricted printers that will have to be moved - so that'll involve our network engineering group, who has no SLA, thus I can pretty much guarantee these users that while their printers will be there, they won't be able to print to them for another two-three weeks.

In the middle of all this - our public call center (we're a non-profit in the healthcare industry) submits an !!!!urgent!!!! request for new user accounts. Ten of them. They all started Monday. My normal turnaround time for new accounts is two three days, which is stated just about everywhere - but they need these ASAP. They've also carbon copied me on the request to the Help Desk, so not only can I not pretend I haven't seen it in order to catch up on everything else, but since the Help Desk sees I've been copied, I won't ever get a ticket for it - they may as well not have sent it to the Help Desk at all.

While I'm chewing out my friend and co-worker who is physically at the call center for not giving me a heads up that they had a new training class, I get an automated PeopleSoft notification. From the call center. They've hired four new permanent employees - in addition to the ten temps, and I checked - these new hires are NOT on the request they turned in. Needless to say - I know nothing about these users, either, and since I've got PeopleSoft notices, they are already physically here filling out their paperwork.

zomg!

[ramennoodlegirl.livejournal.com]

the REGISTRAR deals with REGISTRAtion! holy shit people! do you not get the connection? what the hell are you all doing in college? just because you register for classes online does not mean that the tech department deals with that! so don't get mad at me when i can't pull your lost password out of my ass and hold your hand through the process of logging in and getting your classes!

Note to kindly gents at Helpdesk

[xforge.livejournal.com]

When someone calls and says their printer isn't working, before sending a deskside agent out, please could you ask three simple questions:

1) Is it plugged in?

2) Is it turned on?

3) Is it connected to the computer?

Thanks. Y'all do a frickin' kickass job otherwise but PLEASE.

I can't make this stuff up. Seriously.

[pantherchild.livejournal.com]

~Two stories for you today!

( a webticket, and the ensuing hilarity in IRC )

~And...back when I worked at the campus helpdesk, we got a frantic call from a kid that was something like the following:

HELP. BROKE UP WITH GIRLFRIEND AND SHE CHANGED MY CAMPUS ACCOUNT PASSWORD. PLEASE HELP.

~So many things wrong with that. :-D ~

Had to share...

[azzy23.livejournal.com]

Guy calls in. He's asian, very thick accent, which doesn't usually bother me at all.

His issue:

One of our products uses an environtment variable "system_dir".

His question:
His windows 2000 systems run this product in c:\winnt\system32. He is wondering if "system_dir" also applies to c:\windows\system32 on his 2003 and XP machines.

My answer:
Yes, it is the same.

His second question:
Can I provide him with documentation of this?

My answer:
No, I don't have any documentation of this, but Microsoft probably will have something official.

His response:
Complete Man-Wiggins. Why can't we give him this documentation?!

My response:
We can't provide anything that could put us at legal liability for a product we didn't create.

Here's the rest. He flips out, says that we DID write this product. I clarify that yes, we wrote the product that runs in "system_dir", but we didn't create environmental variables in his OS. That would be Microsoft. He doesn't understand. I happily guide his rude ass to the environment variables settings in his OS. This takes around 20 minutes, because this guy WILL NOT LET ME FINISH A SENTANCE. Not one sentance, and I'm not exaggerating. I finally get irritated, and just sit there quietly. He spins for a few minutes, then raises his voice, saying: "I don't understand why this question is so hard for you to answer!!" I calmly reply, "It's not a technically difficult question, sir, but it is very difficult to answer any question when I'm interuppted everytime I speak. Would you like me to answer your question?"

"YES!"

"Will you let me finish my sentance this time?"

"yes.".... AND THEN HE LAUGHS.

I take a breath. I exhale. I say: "Ok. As you can see in the enviroment variables, Microsoft has defined the variable "windir" as c:\windows. Since the system32 folder must be in the "windir" (whatever that directory may be), it can be logically assumed by the system that c:\windir\system32 is the same as "system_dir". This variable setting allows us to run correctly on any OS, because the system32 is always in the windir. So you see, Microsoft has created this convention, and they would have to-"

"THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT I ASKED YOU. I want to speak to a different technician."

*SUPER happy voice* "Absolutely, sir! One moment, please."

I get a 2nd level tech, explain the issue. After about 10 minutes of laughter, I pick up the customer.

"Sir, I've gotten you a 2nd level technic-"

"I sent you an email, did you read it?"

"No sir."

"Read it please. It's my question, maybe it will help you understand what I want to know."

"Ok." I read the email, it says:

My windows 2000 systems run this product in c:\winnt\system32. I am wondering if "system_dir" also applies to c:\windows\system32 on my 2003 and XP machines?"

I say:

YES. YES. YES, IT'S THE SAME, YES. THAT'S WHAT I'VE TOLD YOU THIS WHOLE TIME. THE ANSWER IS YES.

"Oh. Okay, that's all I needed." *click*

AAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!WHY GOD WHY!!ONE!!!eleventyleven!!

*pant pant pant*
Sorry that was so long...

Silly Customer...

[k8mnstr.livejournal.com]

Today our word for the day comes from one of our very own customers. Today's word is modificated (mawd`E fi kat-ed) verb - a.) to modify to the point of incomprehension (Example: We have a problems with the accounts mails of the client. The passwods of all accounts mails don´t works. We modificated the password by admin panel of the domain but the accounts don´t works)

Is it just my customers, or does anyone else find that using spellcheck is too taxing for customers?