A Day in the LIfe.....

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

The problem description in a ticket that popped into my inbox yesterday morning....

"User needs assistance in activated his active desktop for remote access"

... and people wonder why technical types gravitate towards chemical alterations (coffe, pop, beer, etc) and high-stakes hobbies (shooting, flying, etc)....

Oh, yes. Did I mention that this was submitted as a high priority?

------------------------
insert temple scratching
and lunch break here
------------------------

In the fine tradition of (in)competent call takers, the real problem was not even close. It seems someone got his home computer outfitted with our VPN and setup a consumer copy of outlook attached to his exchange account. Oh, and to cap it off - had it download his ENTIRE corporate mailbox to his home computer... complete with emails needed for an afternoon meeting with some Seriously Senior (tm) exec. Grrr....

I'm SOOO going to enjoy blowing the piss out of some Blackberries on Friday. Thirty caliber holes are not horribly impressive in them. I wonder what .38 or .45 will do?

ATTENTION: USELESS COW-IRKERS!!!

[grayhawkfh.livejournal.com]

Is it *really* so much to ask that you put the relevant FSCKING INFORMATION in the ticket once you've worked on it? I know it's making you late for your hourly buttsecks train, but I don't think I'm out of line when I'm asking something so simple as for you to do your GODDAMN JOB!

(Background: I was given a ticket today to map 2 users to a shared folder on the network. Except, as was found out by one of the so-called Network Engineers, they actually need to be mapped to a different network folder. Of course, no one had bothered to put *THAT* information in the goddamn ticket. F*ckers! So I just wasted my time, and will have to go back tomorrow to undo what I did and do it again. F*ckers!)

(X-posted to my personal LJ)

You know it's time to cut and run when...

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

- when management gets the idea that you're a "customer service" general assistance desk and secretarial pool, rather than a technical repair and resolution team.

- when you have personally logged more tickets (by around 50%) than anyone else in the entire 25,000-user organisation

- when 60% of your incoming calls are issues your team can do nothing about, and no-one is prepared to address this

- when, despite a constant tickets-resolved-per-personnel-dollar figure, management insists on hiring many underpaid burbling morons instead of a handful of ultracapable bright sparks

- when you spend half your strength each day wading through the rising tide of red tape and management crap


What have I missed?

How do I spell Head desk?

[darkblade1.livejournal.com]

Cust: Is renew spelled Renue?

Me: No it's R e n e w.

*head desk*

It's been a rough day. I need either booze or rest.

Red Alert!

[captpackrat.livejournal.com]

There's one particular person at work who calls me on my cellphone nearly every Friday on my day off, usually with some really stupid problem.

I was playing around with my new RAZR phone, and figured out how to create my own ring tones. So I set that particular user's phone number as the red alert klaxon from Star Trek.

Now I'll know when NOT to answer the phone....