We needed that?

[aphrodeia.livejournal.com]

My teeny computer repair business got a call a few days ago from a user whose computer just 'isn't working right.' My tech/husband went to their home to assess the damage, and it turns out that it's riddled with virii and spyware, including a particularly creative backdoor. This seemed to be the overwhelming bulk of it, but something was amiss.

It was quiet. Too quiet. My tech asked the fiance' of the user, and was told that the fan had been too loud, so said fiance' took it upon himself to fix it.

...

He cut the wires.

WHEE!

(no subject)

[anivair.livejournal.com]

So my Gm called me yesterday, after hours, while I was trying to sleep.

"Joe, it's Tom. Give me a call on my cell when you get this. it's important."

Well, it wasn't important. There's a salesman that he's got it out for and wanted to know how long it would take me ot get all the pertinant incriminating files (should there be any) from his computer. I told him an hour (so as to give myself 45 spare minutes).

What pisses me off about this is that he lied. this wasn't important. I dragged myself from a nice nap because he is being a nosey prick. if you want to fire a guy, fire him. if you want to node around his stuff then do it on your own time.

Evidence: some personal email, a bookmarked Alanis Moriset lyric generator, some personal paperwork related to recent injuries suffered, and internet checkers. ooooh. rough stuff.

there were a ton of porn links, but those are, in my opinion, all adaware or somehting. he certainly didn't bookmark fifty some odd porn sites in organized folders sorted by category and alphabetically. Some other site diid that for him. he may have been on that one site, or it may have just been a popup and I can't really prove or disprove it one way or the other.

the sad part? he'll probably get fired for all that. not the porn, but the rest of it. Not because it's a probkem. nobody else would get fired for it. but he will because the Gm doesn't like him. he was basically looking for an excuse. this is tame compared to what I would find on almost any other computer in hte office.

I wish that management would just grow a pair and do their own firing, rather than using us as a hard shoulder to ease their concience. Rubbish.

later,
~joe

Best lines for female techs?

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

So why is it that callers have a much harder time accepting a female voice as their information source? Heck, I thought Majel Barrett set the stage for omnipotent technical knowledge forty years ago. Not to mention assorted priestesses and oracles in the distant past (not much good for callers who failed history). Artemis/Diana would be a logical choice for an (information) hunter deity, would she not? So why do female techs get treated like Cassandra?

Most relevantly, are there words, lines, or turns of phrase which can gently (or not-so-gently) help befuddled callers quickly realise that yes, the female voice on the other end of the line can fix their computer?

"Please don't press this button again"

[coyoteden.livejournal.com]

from LJ Dev: "Another customer in the facility accidentally pressed the EPO button, then depressed it, replaced the protective case, and left the building."

Hhh...huh... HOW DO YOU "ACCIDENTALLY" PRESS A COVERED BIG RED BUTTON!

Accidentally? Bullshit. That was sabotage.