WTF?

[frit.livejournal.com]

I posted this in my journal but I thought y'all might get a kick out of it. (I do tech support through a chat interface btw)

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Here is a series of messages I have just received from a customer. I have not edited these in any way.

cust: ok will have to try later because of easedropping on my telephone via
Electromagnetic Freqency microwave voice data image electronics entering my home and your phone line
cust: these people have pirated some sort of satellite communications and are using EMF to disturb communications and neurotransmitters in persons minds.
cust: however this does not solve the problem of trying to utilize my home business line for my home business.
me: I'm sorry but you are changing topics constantly. What do you wish to do at this time?
cust: of all things i personally think these unscrupolus people are using a series of inventions from our bell laboratories
cust: or have stolen inventions from our bell att labs
cust: are you still there

the witchita lineman may be on the line from the 13000 years war

Comments

[krrayn.livejournal.com]

Tell them the foil hats don't work on phones.

[frit.livejournal.com]

Heh I never thought of that.

[jecook]

Wow. what are they putting in the Kool-Aid over there?

[frit.livejournal.com]

I have no idea. I should have checked to see what state he was in but I didn't. Damn. LOL

[justsomegurl.livejournal.com]

we have a guy like that who calls here all the time

he likes to tell me the story of how the police held him at gunpoint while they tore his house down. he always thinks that people are hacking his website in canada, but he calls us because we are his dialup ISP in the USA. makes sense, right?

he's good for a laugh though

[frit.livejournal.com]

I said to a friend of mine that it was probably a good thing I wasn't actually on the phone talking to him because I'd probably be shitting myself trying not to laugh. HA

[muggleangel.livejournal.com]

You know, this person sounds Schizophrenic. Parinoia and scattered thoughts are both very typical.

[frit.livejournal.com]

*shrugs* I wouldn't know. I closed the ticket not too long after this because he was going to call later. But it certainly made the day more interesting. LOL

[jjjiii]

My script tells me that the user's problem is schizoprhenia. Apply 50mg of thorazine, and if that doesn't work escalate to the electroshock therapy department. If that fails, lobotomize.