A simple one-liner says it all.

[drquuxum.livejournal.com]

"No, I will not install Photoshop on your Eee."

Sometimes you get good ones

[tuba-man.livejournal.com]

Support Ticket of the day:

IRQL is Not Less than or Equal to (Dammit)

Brought to you by our voip programming client.

questions and answers.

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

1. What motivates you to do great job every day?
a great job? absolutely nothing. an adequate job? the need for food and shelter. today i showed a computer room operator how to put a shortcut to a database on their desktop. yes. right click, drag, drop, create shortcut. roughly 15 years of that CRAP. of me doing the most simple of thinking FOR people. i have become that which enables other people's lazyness and lack of effort. i'm enabling stupidity and i've been doing it for many years. someone got mildly miffed today because after they'd completely hosed their computer, and after i'd built a brand new one from scratch for them, that they were missing a SHORTCUT to a frequently used website. O_o i said... so... you want me to come help you put a shortcut into your favorites? that's something you find overly difficult? they did it themselves. i'm so sorry that you have to go through the horrible task of typing a whole website address once into your browser and then click twice. those hatians who lost everything a few weeks ago are sure glad they didn't have me make them a new computer. would you like some aid?

in another area there's a bunch of cubes and a bunch of networked printers. the request was that i route printing for these 10 people to THIS printer cause it's, get this, 5 feet closer than the other networked printer. right. these are all rather large women. who take turns dieting and drinking slimfast, and they want me to rid them of that extra 5 feet of excersize that they wouldn't get otherwise and are annoyed when i balk at the task.

just what is a GREAT job? how about you dictate so that you dont have to get your fingers all tired, is that a GREAT job?

2. What incentives would you like to be awarded For example: plaques for excellent service, having your picture highlighted on a SharePoint wall of fame, global recognition.
yeah, funny, you must be trying to get into or are already in management. managerial types buy books like "1000 ways to incentivise and motivate your employees" and they put them in the bookshelf and they think that if employees see that then the manager must "care" about them. bs. do you want to know what we want? MONEY. cold. hard. cash. i want an extra 15 bucks a week to pay for another bottle of wine so that i can forget that i have to go back in the morning for a couple of hours. i dont want a damn plaque unless i can throw it at you. i dont want a picture unless i can chuck the monitor at something. MONEY. each time managers come up with this crap it isn't seen as "oh, look, they are trying to recognize me! they must care!" what it tells us is "oh look, they are trying to get away with not paying us what we're worth with stupid token bs so that they can keep their payroll as low as possible so that they can look better to upper management so that THEY can get a bonus or a raise. wow. yeah... cmere, i'll tell you where to put your plaque. if you're lucky, i might even tell you where your email has just dissappeared to.

3. What is the most fulfilling moment or experience while working in the It field?
i've had several of those. none of them were while doing tech support. each time i have to go "Fix" a computer cause the "words are really small" and with three clicks i change the screen resolution back to whatever the fuck they somehow got it set to the dirt on my hands gets a little bit harder to wash off.

this is Valis