An epic bag of fail? You decide!

[tauren-wardrums.livejournal.com]

New rule for my customers.

If you lack the ability to form words, please do not call and use obscure phrases to describe things that don't exist. No, you don't have the right to get impatient with me when you can't articulate. It's your problem, not mine. Maybe instead of trade school, you should re-enroll in the second grade.


Here's the rundown:

Customer: "I got a comprutah, says designed for Microsoft 2000, Windows 95, I need something called giga. Everyone knows what giga is. My professor told me I need Windows 2003 and Word 2007, (unintelligible) gigabytes of RAM and 40GB hard drive."

Translation: "I have a computer that's running Windows 2000. I need a memory upgrade so I can install and run Microsoft Office 2007, but I can't properly articulate enough to tell you these things, and I didn't pay attention to what my professor told me I needed even though it's critical to the completion of my classes. I also don't know exactly how much memory I have, nor do I have any idea how much storage space I have, and was hoping you could somehow convey this information over the phone, even though such a thing is impossible. It never occurred to me to bring in my computer and let you physically examine it."

Eventually the line was cut, which made me think that there are poltergeists in our phone, because it jumped over to the second line instead of giving me the disconnect tone.

The moral of the story: English is your friend. It never did anything bad to you personally. Why are you abusing it so? Stop it.

Also, this lady cost me a call. Fortunately, the customer called back and could actually speak. Hooray, nice people.

Also, a bonus. We got a guy who was actually patient, willing to learn, and here's the important bit, he paid attention to what we said and started figuring things out for himself. Congratulations, sir, you are becoming a smarter, more useful member of the computing world. If I had a hat, I'd tip it to you.

EDIT: She brought her computer in. It's actually running--get ready for it--Windows 98SE.