Sweet Jebus on a pogo stiuck, tell me you're kidding...

[fuego.livejournal.com]

So the coworker about whom I was bitching in previous post? She's getting trained on a new client. it's one I used to take phone calls for on occasion, a well-known video game manufacturer (Sorry, I can't say who but if you do video games, you've probably heard of them.) I'm going to be doing some work again for them too.

You know, I think I'd rather take on the extra workload myself and sit here and do that while watching her sleep than I would having to deal with not only telling her how to do the job she's supposedly been doing for five months now, but also this new thing, which involves not only doing actual tech support, but also learning a completely different ticketing system.

How on earth does she keep this job???

*cries*

"Dear Madam: Welcome to the company; here are the balls you requested."

[toxico.livejournal.com]

A while back I relayed the tale of creating a user's email account with a questionable name.

Today I get this request, which instantly evoked those memories:

Please create e-mail address for the following new Managers:





1. Danielle Earwood- #xxxxx
2. Cheryl Jones- #xxxxx- Cheryl has requested her e-mail address be
cajones@company.com

CAJONES. BY REQUEST.

Our bilingual tech (who is actually Hispanic) actually hurt herself laughing. Granted, the actual spelling is cojones but still...

[edit: The other name, in standard format, seems to coincide with the requested cajones...]

BY THE POWER OF HEADDESK

[toxico.livejournal.com]

Something is seriously wrong with people who design free tech swag:



With a shirt like that, I'm not sure if they should be called Lancope or Lactose...

Stolen from a friend.

[two-pi-r.livejournal.com]

E-Mail addresses which would be hard to give out over the phone

• One1TheFirstJustTheNumberTheSecondSpelledOut@hotmail.com
  
• AAAAAThatsSixAs@yahoo.com
  
• Mike_WardAllOneWord@yahoo.com
  
• MikeAtYahooDotCome@hotmail.com
  
• MikeUnderscore2004@yahoo.com
  

What?

[anivair.livejournal.com]

Direct quote from an IT person for a client to me.

"What does FTP stand for again?"

Wow.

yeah.

I guess we'll stick to emailing, then.

(no subject)

[hiroe.livejournal.com]

Fixing a rotor board for an xray machine.

From the parts list, for the TXROT3 rotor schematic:

A * -al jelolt alkatreszeket CSAK ketmunkahalyes generatorba kerulo anodforgato aramkor eseten kell beultetni! Ekkor az RY1 rele helyen a 6-7 es a 3-4 jelzesu pontokat PARONKENT rovidre kell min. 1.5mmxmm keresztmetszetu rez vezetewkkel!

Gee, i wonder if that's important?

Gark.

[demented-pants.livejournal.com]

I work in tech support for a rather large university with a huge department that provides no-cost tech support to anyone affiliated.

There is one person whom I hear from at about the same time every week - a little before 8 am on Sundays, when my overnight shift is almost at an end and I've been in the office ten hours - who is full of fail.

This person is probably about sixty and normally that's not a big deal but she also seems to think that she knows better than us young whippersnappers. She interrupts before you can even START explaining how to do whatever it is she's calling about.

So, no, old lady. I will not spend 20 minutes trying to explain how to use PuTTY to you if you won't listen. Particularly because you didn't tell me you were on a Mac.

Also, no, this is not the homework help line, so stop calling us for help with SQL statements.

I hate on-call

[excludingpauli.livejournal.com]

I just got a level 3 escalation from a client (this means they thwarted both of our outsourcing companies).  The call went like this:

Me: "How can I help you?"

Them:  "Our DS3 and backup T1 are down!!!"

Me: "Okay, when did they go down?"  (Our SNMP traps pick it up as I'm saying this)

Them: "Just now! I NEED YOU TO HELP ME!@"

Me: "Okay, what are the status LEDs on the router showing?"

THem: "They're off! The power is out"

SILENCE

Me: "Did you call the electric company?"

..... Ugh, I can't even deal.....