Stupid first level of the day award...

[kyidyl.livejournal.com]

In my line of work, being a second level technician and not actually taking incoming calls but instead doing callbacks on tickets written by the first level "techs", my stupid users are usually the 1st level people, not the users themselves. Verizon is split into (basically) two companies: Verizon Core, which is anything that used to be BellAtlantic and GTE. And, Verizon Business, which is what they named anything that was MCI. Anything we aquired in that merger is called Verizon Business. Their systems are completely seperate, and not necessarily by geography. We support the whole country and sometimes other countries. I don't support core, I support VzB. VzB people are actually relativly smart...I was blown away by the fact that a lot of them know how to get their own IPs (so I can remote in), and if they don't, they easily take the coaching (Like, "I have the prompt up, what was the command again?").

Verizon's intranet is called eweb. There's one for core, and one for VzB. If you are at a Biz location (and therefore on their domain) you cannot access the core one without VPN and visa versa. The URL's for the two websites are *exactly* the same with the exception of the VzB URL starts with the word "my". So, same URL as core, just with "my" in front of it. Simplest of the simple, right?

You'd think. Today I called on a ticket that said in the subject line "customer cannot get to *core intranet URL*". I check, cust is VzB. All this consultant had to do was tell the customer to put "my" in front of *core intranet URL*. So I called the customer...

Him: So, I don't think you can help me with this. I was at a Biz site when I was trying this and I don't think I can get to eweb from there..
me: Yup, you can't. But you CAN put a "my" in front of the URL when you're at that site and it'll take you to VzB's version of eweb.
Him: Really? And I can get to the employee directory?
Me: Yeah, it's almost exactly the same. It just looks different.
Him: ....Why didn't the t1 tell me that?
Me: Sir, I thought the same thing when I read the ticket.

It's bad when some users are smarter then the "techs".

Also, I used to work at AOL. After that, it's hard to think that anything is worse. Those people are the absolute dregs of humanity for the most part.

WTF is blocking it going to do really :P

[martykins-101.livejournal.com]

So i work for a small ISP which supplies wireless broadband connections to remote areas which can not get DSL.

So i was answering the phones and i get a call from an asian woman that went like this.

Her: *Sobbing* You have to help me.
Me: Ok what is the problem.
Her: I need to get rid of all the porn.
Me: Ok how do you mean.
Her: Well i want all the porn blocked. They do it at the school where i work why can't you do it for us.
Me: Ok thats not possible. We can't do that because of the Freedom acts which are in place.
Her: *Sobbing even louder* Why wont you help me. I think my son is gay and i want to block all the gay porn.
Me: Ok you can get a program that is know as net nanny that will allow you to do this.
Her: OK so i get this program and it block all gay porn. I don't mind the female porn that is ok.
Me: Yes thats what you will be able to do.
Her: OK i am going to look at it. Bye.

So she thinks her son is gay and he likes to look at gay porn. Does she think he wont be gay if he isn't looking at the porn? Two hours later she called back and spoke with someone on the other side of the room saying no one would help her get rid of the gay porn.