cable TV people coming into internet support chat session

[prozacnation.livejournal.com]

Honestly I really don't care. We give them a statement of "sorry this is internet tech support, please call 1-xxx-xxx-xxxx for Cable TV"

This person was so upset that their Cable TV has so many issues (not sure what and nor do I care) but they had to say this to me and then demand I relay this chat onto the president and whatever other big suit in charge. All spelling mistakes are that of the Luser and/or myself.

Me> Thank you for contacting your Online Internet Support....

Luser> Hello- Your program just deleted a detailed description of my problem but I'll try again. Simply put, the channels I pay for are continually not coming in uninteruppted by problems with the images breaking up or the stationd simply not coming in at all. Please advise your managers, president and board of directors of these chronic problems . [luser signed name after this statement]

Me> We apologize for this. However this is technical support for high speed internet. If you are having trouble with your cable TV you will need to call 1-xxx-xxx-xxxx and choose the Cable TV option. We apologize for the inconvenience.

Me> We unfortunately do not have access to troubleshooting your cable TV issues. Our apologies for that factor.

Luser> What can you do for me. I am so annoyed because the programs we watch like pOIRET AND MURDER SHE WROTE ARE ENDING BEFORE WEFIND OUT WHO THE KILLER IS!!!!!


After that line I burst out laughing. Is it that important to "advise your managers, president and board of directors" of not seeing the ending to Murder she wrote?

I gave the "online comment page" to let them vent out their frustrations.

Ending of the chat:

Me> Is there anything we can do for you tonight here regarding your internet?

Luser> No, but in the words of Edwaerd R. Murrow, "Goodnight and Good luck"

::shakes head:: I know we have freaks which we have to do tech support for. But during the weekends, I swear the mental cases come out more and decide to contact us.

Or they smoke crack and decide to initiate a chat session.

Sometimes, sneakernet is the answer

[megpie71.livejournal.com]

Just had three calls in rapid succession from one of our staff here at ReallyBigFirm. Now, I've just started the job here about two weeks ago (helldesk phone monkey, mostly L1 support, occasional L2 if they're easy enough) and I'm still learning my way around the systems.

Anyway, this person is trying to send an email to an external client, however Bloated Notes apparently won't allow her to do this, and it's telling her to use some tool she doesn't have in Office to do things. So, I take remote control of her computer, and discover that the message she's getting rattled by is a warning, rather than an error (one of those lovely "do you *really* want to do that?" messages beloved by the developers) and that the email has been sent. Three times. Caller is happy, another one for my resolved count.

Five minutes later - same person, same problem. She's called the client and he hasn't received the email. Oh-kay, thinks I, and checks the size of the attachment, discovering that the attachment and the email are a total of 27KB. Caller will try again, and see whether there's another way to get this through to her client. I (jokingly) suggest as a last resort that she try a courier and a floppy disk. Another one for the resolved queue.

Third time - about two minutes later - and the client *still* hasn't received the email. However, this time she mentions something else - she had a colleague try to send an email to the same client, and they got a bounce message back. I check - she's been getting the bounce messages too. I explain that there's really nothing we can do about this, which she accepts, and ends the call. A third one for the resolved queue, and my stats are looking a lot better now.

But I suppose it just goes to show, you can never underestimate the bandwidth of a stationwagon with a trayful of floppy disks...