Umm...

[ebtb.livejournal.com]

Got this email from a user evaluating one of our products responding to one of our reminders...

I would like to see results first before i spend money since i have been out of work for 6 months and the computer is my only escape from this world and i do no have much time left

What am I supposed to say to that? Ummm... Fuck spyware - you have bigger things to worry about?

Open letter to IT managers and Their Staff

[toxico.livejournal.com]

Dear Overly-Self-Important Asspandas:

Reasons for calling support include features not working properly, errors during install or normal use, or requests for information in preparation for upgrades to either our products, your operating system or your mail server.

While there are other reasons, one of them is NOT so that we may function as a living and breathing product manual. If you want to know about new features from one version to the next, try reading the fucking file that is aptly named Readme.txt. I don't care what your excuse is, especially if it involves the words "no one ever reads those."

Furthermore, we are not your parents and will not tell you a bedtime story. Therefore, when you say "We pay for support so instead of me reading the documentation you can just tell me," I am simply going to repeat the phrase "That information is in the documentation." Until we begin producing manuals in Audio Book format, which will begin at approximately 0-fuck-hundred on the 30th of February, kindly eat a dick, deflate your ego, and read like it's Harry fucking Potter.

Seething & Abject Hatred,
Tox

(no subject)

[ladynisa.livejournal.com]

Ever have one of those days?

Me: "Thankyou for cal-"

CM: (as quickly as he could muster) "Yeah hi, I know you really need certain information from me to start but I just have one question to ask and I'm in a real hurry its an EMERGENCY!!!"

Me: "... Well, what's the question?" (figuring I could get the question then the info.)

CM: "Umm, there's a tornado coming and I need to know if I should unplug my cable modem. Eek! I think it turned this way!"

Me: "... Sir, I think you should stop worrying about the CABLE MODEM and find a basement or a ditch, NOW!!!"

CM: "... Are you sure?"

ME: "YES! Modems can be replaced, limbs are a bit harder. /GO/!"

(no subject)

[katyism.livejournal.com]

I can't believe I once was a volunteer support answery person, buying into the competitiveness that was (maybe still is?) the livejournal support forum.

That's just how I felt about it several years ago when I paid attention, at least. Are any of you involved with it?