Did she just discover email???

[scorpy01.livejournal.com]

Customer calls to tell me her outlook express keeps timing out. So I check her account.
OMG!!!!!

213M

41,752 email messages

Did she just discover, after FIVE YEARS that she has email with her dialup account? No, it quit working right a while ago so she just stopped using it. Never asked us to fix it, never bothered telling anyone to quit emailing her.

Oh, and she wants all that mail so she can decide what to keep and what to throw away. Uh-huh. She's going to download it with a dialup connection.

Why isn't it Friday????

I want to go HOME.

"Your software broke my keyboard!!"

[spacebird.livejournal.com]

Hi all, I'm new here. I work at a major tech support callcenter, and since we're big and have partners in the Phillipines who transfer to us, I have all sorts of fun stories....

I'll start out with a call from a couple of days ago, as best as I can remember.

ME: "Hello, thank you for choosing ________, my name is Dan, how can I help you?"
CU: "Your goddamn software broke my computer!! I can't type numbers!!"
ME: "You can't type-- sir, which numbers do you mean?"
CU: "The ones over on the right! Have you ever SEEN a keyboard before?!!"
ME: "Sir, is your numlock on?"
CU: "My what?"
ME: "Your number lock."
CU: "..." (hangs up)