Shiny, candy-like button!

[jazzmasterson.livejournal.com]

Problem: computer-controlled industrial equipment does not function. Rebooting machine, controller PC, and in-betweener equipment does not solve issue.

Diagnosis: office cleaning lady's idiot spawn pushed Big Red Cutoff Button on equipment.

Solution: Unclick button, reboot PC, have idiot spawn sterilized, possibly with the well-tested, physician-recommended, coat-hanger-and-hydrochloric-acid method.

Moral: Regardless of anything else, always check Big Red Buttons, as they are magnets for dumb.

You laugh, but that call is buying me groceries this week.

(no subject)

[naggy.livejournal.com]

My dog chewed through the CAT-5 cable between DSL modem and the wall. Should I call SBCGlobal's DSL desk and play like a luser? :)

I always knew this would happen...

[elobscuro.livejournal.com]

So I had to call the big M today. It seems our list of generic COAs is moreincomplete than the customer was satisfied with, and so I agreed to "warm transfer" him to Microsoft, once they were willing to talk to him. Uh-huh. Sure.

It actually wasn't as bad as I'd feared. It really wasn't even as bad as the time I had to escalate on our own custoemr service department. Sure, I ended up having to talk to tech support because custoemr service couldn't quite figure out what I was talking aobut, and kept inisiting that this was all the responsibility of TCWMNBN. And yeah, I had to actually put Microsoft on hold whiole I confirmed exactly which version the customer had. But I managed to squeeze a product key out of tech support in a remarkably short time. And he didn't even try to bill me for it.

Well, now that you ask, no, it didn't work, prompting much wailing and gnashing of teeth. And yeah, when my supervisor called Microsoft back, they gave him another product key... that didn't work. But really, it was like walking up to the gates of Hell, to find it gaurded by a chihuahua and a stack of forms in triplicate, with the inscription, "Just, like, give it up, dude."