![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
(Previously. Recap: University sysadmin.)
- Install signs of any description next to the building's motorized rotating doors.
- ... Especially labels that read, "It is perfectly safe to walk through this device."
- ... Especially when the label can only be read after stepping inside.
- Grief the undergraduates on the Minecraft server they're running on one of the Departmental interactive shell machines.
- Maintain a list of things that
${BOSS_SYSADMIN}
is not allowed to do at work. - Violate Eschaton Clause Three.
- Make clear that when I'm talking about simple alternatives to manipulating git history, that I'm referring to the revision control tools of that name, rather than the Helpdesk manager.
- "I am altering your disk quota. Pray I do not alter it any further."
- Answer queries of the form "What am I doing wrong?" with the response, "Would you like an enumerated list?"
- I shall not refer to the handcrank used for locking / unlocking room partitions as the Education Stick.
- Zero
/etc/passwd
on a clueless user's computer so that they can't log in -- causing the console to print "You don't exist. Go away." when they try to reboot via CTRL-ALT-DEL... - Unload a CO2 fire-extinguisher on people standing next to a 'No Smoking' sign while puffing on a cigarette.
- Use the Justice Field episode of Red Dwarf as a model for how best to educate / punish users that try to do evil things. Such as wipe another user's home directory..
- Configure my workstation to run interesting screensavers with a short time-out, as they may have the effect of diverting the attention of senior members of the department when they stop by my desk to talk to me.
- ... or get them to sign-off on pay-rises or changes in effective responsibility while they're cognitively distracted.
- ... Also, stop trying to take over Security operations. We said 'no'.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 11:32 am (UTC)Fuk that crap. I will <3 this comm til the day I die for its honest, open bullshit-calling-detector algoritm! \o/
no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 01:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 02:49 pm (UTC)One of our level 1 support drones, at the last department meeting which had the CFO as a guest speaker, pulled a 'ONTD'* moment which had pretty much the entire IT management*** alternating between laughing their asses off, or wanting to duct tape the schmuck's mouth shut.
* 'Oh no they didn't!'**
** ... which was talking about things like adding the support group to the tip pool, some limited discussions about how much money they are getting compared to others****, amongst other tomfoolery.
*** along with the rest of us in the network and apps groups.
**** dunno about some places of work, but discussing how much one's salary is with co-workers is forbidden by our company policy, if not good taste.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-02 01:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 12:24 pm (UTC)Why not? That's just...gah!
no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 12:30 pm (UTC)Note to self, must add another item to my list of things not to do: stop using lists like this as a source of inspiration.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 12:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 01:39 pm (UTC)♪♫...Flying out of the sun, the smell of toast is in the air...
When there's a job to be done, the Flying Toasters will be there!...♪♫
no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 02:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-01 04:26 pm (UTC)