stick and stones...

[ebtb.livejournal.com]

It's not even noon and I've been threatened with a class action suit!

We had an update to our software that fixed a nasty little bug. This bug didn't prompt people to renew their subscription after a year...nice. So, people who have been using it free for 2 years have called up really angry now that they have to pay to use the software.

Me: Well, sir, it says in your license agreement that you purchased it in October of 2003, so it expired in October of 2004.
Luser: What I had was software that worked and now I have nothing!
Me: You are more than welcome to renew your subscription for half-price for another year.
Luser: I want the old version back! Per your instructions I had to remove the old version to get this update!
Me: Right, which fixes the problem of people being able to use the software for free.
Luser:  And no where in this email does it say I would lose my software! Ma'am, do you know what a class action law suit is?
Me: Yes, as a matter of fact, I do.
Luser: Do you wanna see one?
Me: Not particularly. But according to your license agreement you purchased a year subscription. Legally, we are not obligated to provide you with any updates past the year. You actually got 2 free years of updates.
Luser: I want to speak to your supervisor!
Me: Absolutely! One moment...

15 minutes later...

Me: *spiel*
Luser:  GET THE PRESIDENT OF YOUR COMPANY ON THE PHONE FOR ME RIGHT NOW!
Me:  You got it! *sends him to customer service*

I pray for the day I see a summons in the mail.

Comments

[anivair.livejournal.com]

my favorite is when people threaten to sue us over a fifteen dollar account.

"Yes, sir," I say to them. "I strongly urge you to make use of your right ot sue us over this account in hte ammount of fifteen dollars and thirty four cents. I will, in fact, take a whole day off work to come down to the courthouse and testify before grand jury.

[fixerkitty.livejournal.com]

Hell, if you do, make sure you sneak a camera in. Then put it up on YouTube so we can join in the hilarity. ;)

[attackgypsy.livejournal.com]

In fact, I will enjoy it, as in THIS state, if something like this happens, and its because of my job, and I get summoned, I get PAID to be there by the company! It gets me off of the phone for a whole day, or maybe even two! Could you stretch it out to a week for me, pretty please? I'll give you twenty bucks to do it.

[gilmoure.livejournal.com]

I love the smell of entitlement whores in the morning. It smells like...victory!

[compwizrd.livejournal.com]

norton antivirus 5 would let you uninstall and reinstall and get another year out of it.

[goose-entity.livejournal.com]

... the problem there being that you would be using Norton Anti Virus...


:-P

[foobarintel.livejournal.com]

hahahah yeah oh man, we have people like that from time to time.

Our software is on a "per-session" rate. It's something like $100 an hour. I can't go into what it is - but it's not adult or naughty or anything like that.

But man, people will call up and threaten to sue the pants off of us. This one guy managed to get the extension to our CEO's desk - and let me tell you what, the CEO more or less just told him to go fsck /dev/himself