Letter to my customers

[usekh.livejournal.com]

Dear Wank..er..Customers,
Intimating in any way that you are going to cancel your account and go elsewhere if the issue isn't fixed immediately/exactly how you want it/whatever will not get you any better customer service. I don't care if you and all your friends quit. Seriously, go for your life. One less moron to bother us.

Kind Regards
Jaded Techie

Comments

[piepants.livejournal.com]

Haha threats.

[ebtb.livejournal.com]

as we say here "this guy used up his $19.95's worth of tech support" Yes, please go to the competition - bother them. Although, while I have no ill will towards other software companies' techs since they are just doing the same thing I am...perhaps I should wish the customer to just stop using a computer.

[lordstorm.livejournal.com]

Ah, the techie's Unofficial Anthem. Sir, I salute you!

[gremlingirl.livejournal.com]

What always gets me about that argument is why, the lowest rung on the corporate totem pole, usually the ones without benefits and working on contract, would remotely give a shit about a customer loss.

[usekh.livejournal.com]

*nods*And they also ask about our policies/prices/plans etc etc as if they were my fault. Like I have any say in them?

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

Because apparently we're supposed to be the Sales, Retention, and Ass-kissing Department as well.

"I'm going with someone else!"
"OKthxbai." *click*

[duality.livejournal.com]

heh, i've actually used that phrase but that was because where i was calling, their set up was completely retarded. i had a phone that was breaking and wanted to get another one. i was told that despite having money in the bank to pay the phone outright, they'd instead just bill me and they felt i didn't have good enough credit for them to take a chance on that. my response to them of "so what you're telling me is in order to get a working phone i need to go to another provider" got me shunted over to the "save this client" queue.