(no subject)

[supportbitch.livejournal.com]

SuB has had quite the week.

My personal computer decided to crap its powersupply last weekend, and it's taken me an embarassing amount of time to fix it.

On top of that, I had a several gems on the phones...



SuB: Thanks for calling $COMPANY. I'm SuB. Can I get your login information?
$USER: It's $LOGIN.
SuB: Ok, let me look you up real quick. I've found your account...*confirms details*
$USER: Are you going to take TECHNICAL information?
SuB: Excuse me, sir?
$USER: Are you a real tech?
SuB: I assure you, sir, I am a real tech and perfectly capable of solving your issue.
$USER: Are you going to transfer me to a real tech?

*smoke begins to pour from SuB's ears*

SuB: Sir, why don't you just go ahead and tell me your problem?
$USER: Ok, the cluster service on one of my high avalbility cluster nodes isn't starting.
SuB: *troubleshooting*
$USER: *assholery*
SuB: *breathes fire* You know what, sir? I'd like to go ahead and start you a support ticket and get you to upload your configuration files so I can look at them
$USER: Fine, whatever. I want you to clal me back. How long do I have to wait?
SuB: Sir, it depends on how much research I need to do into your issue and how busy we get. I'll have something for you by end of business.
$USER: Fine, whatever.
$TEAMLEAD: Wow, SuB, I thought you were going to explode.
SuB: *smiles sweetly* That guy's a total goatfucker.
$TEAMLEAD: *backs away slowly*
A few hours later, I acutally get around to looking at the files. I diff the two files from the two nodes...and they are WILDLY different. You may not know much about a high-avalbility cluster...but each node MUST be identical in the cluster configuration or they won't work. IT's freaking common sense if you know anything about them.

So, I call $USER back.

SuB; This is SuB with $COMPANY, calling about $TICKET.
$USER: Oh, hi SuB.
SuB: So, I think I've found the source of your issue. You need to have the configuration files be identical on each node. Just scp the good one to the other. The good one will be...yes sir?
$USER: I was jsut seeing if you'd actually catch that. Have a great day!
SuB: ....WTF? I. Need. A. Drink.



And, of course, the guy I got just before that:



SuB: What can I help you with today, sir?
$USER: This should be easy.
SuB: Ok...
$USER: The cp -f command doesn't work. It still prompts me to say if I want to overwrite a file.
SuB: Let me test that...it wokrs on my system.
$USER: What version are you on?
SuB: Version 4, update 2.
$USER: MINE'S VERSION 3 UPDATE 6. TEST IT ON THAT.
SuB: Let me put you on hold.

I proceed to take my own sweet time finding a 3 box and testing it. It has the same behaviour as the $USER's box. Interesting. I figure out how to fix it and go back to the phone.

SuB: Hi, sir, are you still there?
$USER: YES.
SuB; Ok, I have replicated the issue, and you need to go into root's ~/.bashrc and remove the alias. cp is aliased to cp -i, so...
$USER: But won't that make it never ask?
SuB: Ah...yes.
$USER: WHAT?! I WANT IT TO ASK ME.
SuB: Sir...?
$USER: YOU JUST LEFT ME ON HOLD FOR 10 MINUTES WHERE I HAD TO LISTEN ABOUT HOW YOU'VE GOT SUCH GREAT SUPPORT. I DON'T THINK YOUR SUPPORT IS ALL THAT GREAT. WHAT I WANT is to have the -f override the -i like it does in the mv command! THIS IS A FLAW IN YOUR OPERATING SYSTEM. I DEMAND TO FILE A BUG REPORT.
SuB: Ok, sir, I can make a ticket and put it in as a bug report.
$USER: I've had bugs before! And YOUR engineers told me that they wouldn't fix them!
SuB: Well, sir, there's a complicated proce...
$USER: I WANT AN UPDATE BY END OF BUSINESS ON AN ETA FOR THIS BUG FIX.
SuB: Sir! We won't know by the end of the day. There's a PROCESS they have to GO THROUGH.
$USER: I WANT AN UPDATE.
SuB: Sir, I'll give you an update by the end of the day. But I may not be able to give you an ETA.
$USER: FINE WHATEVER.

At that point, I'd pretty much crossed from passive aggressive to full out aggressive. And this JACKNUT really thought yelling at me was going to help. Oh, no no no.

The process I mention is that the bug reports filter through the upper level techs, then hit engineering. Upper level techs have to reproduce, do troubleshooting, etc. So I go and grab Aaron from the upper level techs and ask him personally to take the ticket.

See, Aaron's a flaming asshole. He's got a supiriority complex, and a sneer glued to his face. He's an asshole. But he's damn good at what he does.

So, I try and filter everyone I hate through him.

I update the ticket telling the user that I've escalated the ticket and a tech will contact him shortly. I also mention that engineering will problaly ask him to be on the most recent update, so he should be prepared to upgrade. His response?

THEY NEED TO REPORDUCE THE ERROR THEMSELVES BEFORE I EVEN *CONSIDER* UPGRADING.

Hah.

And for the record? -f (force) means two very different things in cp (copy) and mv (move). So...it's gonna be NOTABUG.

Mmmm, sometimes I feel evil like Microsoft.



On top of this, I also have a huge project and a few asses on it that I have to work with and a couple I have to kiss to get my way. Awesome.

I think I'm going to play World of Warcraft until my eyes bleed.

Comments

[gholam.livejournal.com]

Your icon reminds me...

There are no words to describe the fury that is Green Lizard. In fact, just yesterday we had an epic battle for the stables.

There Greenlizard was, standing by the flag, acting AFK, but only to lull me into a false sense of security. I patrolled around to find any shadowmelded hunters, druids, rogues, etc, but none were there, only Greenlizard had the courage to defend while the rest of his team zerged on mindlessly.

I try to cap the flag without him noticing me, and I am just about there, when he gets a moonfire off the clever bastard. And then, another moonfire, and as I'm reeling from those, he moonfires me again. I begin to panic as I spring towards him, I pop a combat pot, and he winds up a starfire, but I manage to kick it. I get a few backstabs off, but this does not phase the sultan of spam, and I am moonfired again in no time, then to follow this move up, I get blasted by another moonfire. Things ultimately end with a kidney shot and a backstab, but not before Greenlizard went out of mana, as only Greenlizard can.

Eleven paladins then killed me, along with a night elf rogue, but the real damage was done by Greenlizard and, according to my combat log, his seventy four moonfires in three seconds.

(Greenlizard is a fairly well-known moonkin druid on my server)

[gholam.livejournal.com]

Not my story. I keeeeeel Greenlizard dead. I play a warlock :)

[spacebird.livejournal.com]

Warlocks FTW. (The icon is my warrior, my first love, but I'm currently playing a lock and have been completely won over. The Dark Side has cookies.)