This makes the 3rd time I've talked to this guy today about IE

[katyism.livejournal.com]

Scenario: Talking to elderly professor on phone. Determined he needs to set his IE default home page to something other than MSN.com because MSN's web search is sucking right now, but he depends on it to find the URLs he types in.

Me: Are you aware that you can type those URL addresses into the address bar instead of the search box? The address bar is that long white area spanning the top of the screen. It usually has http:// something or other in it, you've seen that right?
Elderly Prof: Yes, and I always forget that it's there so I just type in the search box. It shows up in the middle of the screen and it's very easy to find.
Me: Okay...well, the search box in the middle comes from a Microsoft website, and their website is having problems today as you saw when you did that last search. We can't help out with that. But I can show you how to change it so that it comes up with a Google search box instead. Do you know about Google?
EP: Yes, I usually use Google on other computers but I don't know how to make it come up on this one so I just forgot about it.
Me: OK, well here's how... Click the Tools menu at the top part of the screen, go to Internet Options, there will be a box to type in, labelled Home Page... and you can just type in Google's address there or any address you want, really. It will be the site that comes up every time you go on the web from now on.
EP: See this is the problem. I don't know Google's address. I would have to search for it to get to it normally.
Me: thinking "Oh no, he depends on search engines to find his search engine of choice..." Uh... that would be www.google.com sir.
EP: Whoa! How did you know that?
Me: I have it memorized.
EP: Do you have a lot of those memorized? When I talked to you earlier about the National Institute of Health site that the government runs, you were quoting the address nih.gov back to me right away. That's amazing.
Me: Yes...well, I spend hours a day on the internet, and thus I have a lot of website addresses memorized. It's no different than remembering a phone number that you call a lot.
EP: You never know about phone numbers. Wow. Just...wow. I would never have remembered something like www.google.com. I am going to have to bookmark it right, because I'll forget, right?
Me: No need to bookmark it. Typing it here will make it be your home page, and if you ever get away from your home page you click the little "home" button that looks like a house on the toolbar, and it will take you back to your Google home page.
EP: Oh neat. You know sometimes I even get lost going to the cigar store from work on my way home because of the new bypass highway they built outside of town in 1997, were you here for that?
Me: No sir, I wasn't. Click OK now, then click that house button. There's Google. I wish I could make a "Cigar Store" button for you, but I can't. Good day.
EP: Heh *click*

Not bad, at least he knows he's forgetful....

Comments

[drquuxum.livejournal.com]

At least he seems blissful in his senility.

[katyism.livejournal.com]

Re-reading what I post it makes him sound more lucid than he was... I've paraphrased a lot of long pauses and wobbly "uhhhmmms..." But I think we were on the same page *pun!*

[thalionar.livejournal.com]

You never know about phone numbers.

oh, my! I love elderly, senile professors, especially when they're as amenable as that one seems to be :)

[jecook]

I <3 your icon.

[thalionar.livejournal.com]

thanks! totally gakable. The base image is from here: http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/dd/20060401a

If you use, it, please credit me :)

[jecook]

::reads page in question::

Oh. Emm. Gee.

That gag was almost as good as the one Blizzard pulled on the newbie WoW players (which I fell for).

[thalionar.livejournal.com]

isn't that fun? :)

(yeah, I heard about the WoW one... too funny! facial hair...*giggle*)

My D&D group has been having a blast with chatting about the d20 MLP game, but we've somehow mangled it to Care Bears (since, you know, they have the Care Bear Stare). I am now afraid of some of our younger (20-ish) members and their in-depth knowledge of the Care Bears...

[fuego.livejournal.com]

I wish I could make a "Cigar Store" button for you, but I can't.

cute!

[linguafranca.livejournal.com]

Aww, he was funny.

[gilmoure.livejournal.com]

Reminds me of an old '50's SF short story, about how in the future, they find this genius child that's taught himself how to remember numbers in his head instead of his PDA and even do arithmatic with them. He's going to be the secret weapon in the great war they're involved in.

[captpackrat.livejournal.com]

I know at least one person in the office here who uses MSN's search thingie to type in URLs. Including Google's.

And I quit setting people's browsers to about:blank for their home page, because everyone would complain that "their Internet is down"

[dogsolitude.livejournal.com]

Wow. Where were you April 1st? That would have been good to push out through a policy for the benefit of my 'help' desk.

[guinevere33.livejournal.com]

I always set it to Google for three reasons, in this order:

1) It has one graphic, so takes no time to load.
2) Google is never down, so if the page doesn't load you know immediately that your internet connection has a problem.
3) Everybody uses it, so it's actually kinda useful.

[blossomingfire.livejournal.com]

I love the elderly professors because they at least admit they don't have a clue when it comes to computers, unlike the baby boomers who are in total denial or try to pretend they are an "expert", and have to call me when they've fux0red it up beyond belief.

[geekgrrl-ca.livejournal.com]

I seem to get all the elderly professers who are entitlement bitchs.

[joester-the.livejournal.com]

OMG thats so funny because I have had at least 3 calls EXACTLY like this today.

DAM YOU MSN SEARCH!!!