(no subject)

[azzy23.livejournal.com]

Jerk: Hi. My database is all jacked up. Can you fix it?

Me: Sure, I'll need to connect and run some scripts.

Jerk: Oh, no, you can't connect.

Me: I most likely can, we use a secure connection tool...

Jerk: No, I mean I won't allow you to connect. I'm in security, I know how this works!

Me: Ok. So. You want me to walk you through running homemade scripts that might eat your database, instead of connecting, making sure you've got a safe backup, and being able to see firsthand if something needs to be changed or replaced to correct your database problems?

Jerk: Exactly.

*insert thumb in arse, sit.*

Comments

[gilmoure.livejournal.com]

So...if you know how this works, you don't need help?

[azzy23.livejournal.com]

Yeah... I got in trouble once for saying, "Wow. You seem to know our product really well. Y'know... there's an empty cube right behind me, why don't you just pop down and grab a call??"

[network-nerd.livejournal.com]

I think the "Repair Metadata" command should do it. Type along: "rm *"...

[ihateemo.livejournal.com]

LOL!!! :D

[klytus.livejournal.com]

Well, the customer is always right, after all. I say *let* the farging homemade scripts eat his non-backed-up data! Next time he calls (if he still has a job), he'll be far more coperative.

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

"You're in security? Then I'm afraid I can't talk to you over the phone - you could be anybody. You'll have to come over in person, and your manager has to be there too. Otherwise, it's just not secure."

[canray.livejournal.com]

Ah yes, the overly paranoid.

I work for a US Cable Internet Company, for their Wireless department (They're giving a combination Cable Modem/Wireless Router unit.).

One of my first calls in the department was with an old man that read one FAQ on Wireless Security, and watched a lot of *BAD* Hacker movies (Like there's any good ones.).

I went like this through the call: "No... No... No... It doesn't work that way... No... That Technology doesn't exist. Nope. Doesn't happen that way. Yes, that does work, but we don't offer that, it's for businesses that handle lots of personal info and is a likely target for hacking. No. No... DEAR GOD NO!!! Sir... No, sir... Neo will *NOT* be able to jump into your computer."