O.o

[toxico.livejournal.com]

We support a number of different products, one being a hardware appliance for the scanning of various incoming/outgoing traffic. The hardware for slightly older models can every so often be acquired on eBay . To obtain support, a valid software contract must be in place unless it's a hardware failure problem; if you don't have a hardware contract, you're SOL at this point if the power supply blows, hard drive goes bad, etc. Generally this isn't a major deal, as 99% of people calling for this product have valid contracts for both and are usually fairly bright and willing to follow advice and directions, which is actually quite nice.

A ...rather irate woman has been calling here for the past few days. She bought her appliance on eBay and tried to purchase a software contract for it, which is perfectly fine. As mentioned earlier, though, if something's wrong with the actual box itself we can't help her.

We have tried to help her on multiple occasions, with things beyond our scope and things we shouldn't help her with due to lack of support. She refuses to cooperate in any way. Literally.

It took three days for her to figure out how to burn a CD with a .iso image. Three. Fucking. Days. The main problem? She didn't have a CD-RW capable drive. And we kept telling her that too. For all we know she was trying to burn the image on the back of a Hall & Oates CD or something. And she's trying to image and configure a gateway appliance?

She eventually became abusive and refused to give us information at all. We have a piece of information we ask for at the beginning of the call; she began refusing this, stating "Name's S****** M*****, you know who I am and you can look it up."

Her foul demeanor escalated over a few days so quickly that her software contract was cancelled and her money refunded. She has been asked on a conference call - with every supervisor over our entire department, a sales rep and a customer service supervisor present - to NOT call for support and that we will NOT do business with her.

Through the luck of the draw, I've not had to speak to her as of yet. She's got one guy's direct number, whose cube happens to be directly across from me. We've been instructed to contact a manager immediately should she call back or attempt to contact us by any means. I came in today just in time to listen to two of the three messages on his voice mail from this woman.

If I had any means of obtaining these messages, I assure you they'd be gold. She has left messages for this guy saying things such as "You'd better call me back, you chickenshit mother fucker" and "I'm going to kick you're fucking ass and you won't have a job." Even emailed him with "Answer your phone you lowlife!" She has no problem saying the same things to management and has physically threatened several employees here. She claims to own "seven corporations" and has "taken down General Motors and HP" and is now "going to take us down" as well.

I wish I could accurately portray this to you all; unfortunately, my description just can't capture it well enough. If there is any way I can get a transcript of these voice mails or even a copy of them, you'd better believe I'm sharing.

Supposedly her husband is the company owner and president. They're in the same state as us. ROAD TRIP.

(x-posted to my own journal, and edited to remove link to company's website)

[another edit: The Senior VP of Tech Support and Customer Service just came and had a hearty laugh at the VMs.]

Comments

[tsutton.livejournal.com]

I think the purpose of this community is to tell us about the horror story, but not name & shame. So I'd suggest you remove the details about the company.

[rileydag.livejournal.com]

Shame and name, I would hope not if it's just for the sake of drama. Shaming and naming if it's a company that does bad business, heck yeah!!!

[toxico.livejournal.com]

Done and done. Thanks for the input on that.

BWAHAHAHAHA

[irishmasms.livejournal.com]

At ICS-NETWORK.NET, the customer always comes first.

[rileydag.livejournal.com]

I really like the unlicensed Matrix graphics on their main page.

They provide infrastructure to wireless carriers and she can't configure a gateway. I would hate to have my cell phone service provider utilize her resources.

[thecrazyfinn.livejournal.com]

Heh, that site is hilariously bad. Obviously done with a template, not fully done (Check out the FAQ!) and with several spelling mistakes.

I like how they specify how many minutes you get with each plan, but don't even say what they sell. And they haven't changed the default colour for links so you can't see them against the blue background.

[artela.livejournal.com]

Ah - it's a tinpot little enterprise then - any company of any size would have a "careers and vacancies" page - they don't - ergo, too small to care about :-)

[ghostdandp.livejournal.com]

Looks like a case of harrasment to me. I'd pull out the lawyers :)

[jecook]

+1.

that'll curl her tootsies...

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

i think even without the transcripts that i have a pretty good idea...i've handled calls like that before. one person even threatened to contact our CEO. that was hilarious.

[toxico.livejournal.com]

Oh, she's done that as well.

We have been given permission to tell her to contact the eBay seller for support. :p

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

lmao. that's awesome. also, it's great that your company cut her off. people who are that insanely rude don't deserve tech support.

[jahbulon.livejournal.com]

Gold Jerry! Gold!

[ex-deliveryboy.livejournal.com]

If you said her initials were L.N. I would have shit a solid gold brick.


There is always the potential for proface customers, but once they start threatening bodily harm, that's when I start calling the police.

[goose-entity.livejournal.com]

Please tell me your management has considered taking out an interdict / injunction / restraining order / whateveritiscalledinyourjurisdiction and reporting the insane bat to the police for (at least!) breach of the peace?!!?

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

omg your icon is hysterical.
*chortle*

[goose-entity.livejournal.com]

Ganked from someone else who did not reveal where it was ganked from ;)

And, yeah, I was looking for this one for a while before I found it!

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

awesome.

i love hugo weaving.

[dysan27.livejournal.com]

I'm wondering if the guy behind you would have a case to charge her with harrasment to him personaly. If she is calling/emailing him direct he might be able to get her charged even if the company won't start any procedings.

[spacebird.livejournal.com]

Best. Icon. Ever.

[dysan27.livejournal.com]

Yoink it if you want, credits are on my user icon page.

[bdinger.livejournal.com]

Ahh, how I remember those days. Once someone said to me "I'm going to sue your ass, and sue your companies ass into the ground". My reply?

"Yeah right, take a fucking number. That's the third time I've heard that one today alone".

My boss at the time was laughing so hard he ignored the fact that I had cursed and stuff on the phone :).

[110billion.livejournal.com]

She has been asked on a conference call - with every supervisor over our entire department, a sales rep and a customer service supervisor present - to NOT call for support and that we will NOT do business with her.

I wish we could do that with our customers who are asshats.

[redqueenmeg.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, awesome.

I suppose I could credit her with GM, but Fortune still lists HP as a "Buy," so... she must be lying about something! *snicker*