it's called vibrate, yo

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

dear coworker,

this morning marks the 5,708,923 time your phone has rung at work. this means i have heard your ringtone 5,708,923 times. while it is not the most annoying ringtone in the world, i was pretty much over it after the 3rd time. that means that the other 5,708,920 times have just increased my ire toward you and your stupid fucking cell phone.

somehow, you manage to ignore the multiple emails our boss has sent around about keeping our phones on vibrate. somehow, despite everyone else's ability to turn their phones on vibrate, you insist on having it ring. i suppose your penis is also incredibly large.

if you were a car, you would be a hummer. your conspicous consumption is SERIOUSLY harshing my mellow.

love and kisses,
me

Comments

[armaphine.livejournal.com]

That's when you invest in some earplugs, and set the fax machine to repeatedly call him.

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

ha ha...you can do that (set the fax machine to call someone)? how? do tell.

i actually drown it out by listening to music, but somehow it sneaks through my headphones, it is so damn loud.

[greeklady.livejournal.com]

You just dial the number and the fax machine will try to call them x amount of times. Depends on the machine. Some do it up to 10 times. It is great.

I would just be a shit and forward them the email stating to put the phone on vibrate the next time and every time their phone rings.

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

ha ha ha ha omg that's great. as far as modems go, i could probably scrounge one up here...

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

unfortunately, i don't know his phone number. and i really don't want to have any bad blood between us, since he sits right across from me and has actually done me a few favors.

if only i could forward the email anonymously...

[armaphine.livejournal.com]

Punch in his cell number, queue up a fax job, and set the number of retries to something ungodly. That or dig out an old modem and do it that way. Either way should result in the wonderfully ear-piercing sounds of line noise, and can be repeated pretty much ad nauseum until he decides to set his phone on vibrate. At which point, you may wish to kill it. Ya know, to provide positive feedback.

Because, as all of us that have sat thru the HR touchy-feely classes know... positive feedback is a good thing!

[jecook]

::reads all threads::

I like fax machines.

I don't get junk faxes anymore, mainly because I return with a 20 minutes worth of single page faxes (if they've been foolish enough to provide a return fax #) all stating to take my number off their list.

The catch? the letters are white on a black background. ::EVIL Cackle::

[sabra-n.livejournal.com]

I'm a regular theatergoer.

For some reason, I don't like cell phones. *twitch*

[ace-brickman.livejournal.com]

wonderful!! you should send them a bill for "initializing" their toner cartridges or something after said opt-out requests ;)

[shmuffle.livejournal.com]

No matter what your ringtone is, you always sound like a fucktard when it goes off. Default Nokia/Motorola/etc ringtone? Fucktard. Your favourite song? Fucktard.

I think the only exception would be a discrete beeping or "ringing" type ringtone. Anything else distracts everyone in a 10m radius of the phone and announces "even a wrong number is more important than whatever it was that you were trying to do".

Rar. I don't like mobile phones much. >.>

[taleya.livejournal.com]

YAY! good on you!

I hate the ring tones. Unfortunately mine is a necessary evil for out of work contact at times - but I still get boggled looks when I deliberately don't have mine with me.

Hey, when I'm off the clock, I'm off the fucking clock. Cram your shiny piece of attention whoring up your arse and read a fucking book.

[megpie71.livejournal.com]

Our office has a very strict "no fsckin' mobiles switched on at your desk" policy. It's very strict for the simple reason that a mobile phone within range of our particular brand of headset produces a very loud, very annoying buzzing noise. It even does this when the mobile phone is on the other end of the conversation (which can be on the other side of the continent). People who breach this tend to find themselves getting glared at by all and sundry, and our helldesk manager comes down on them like a ton of very annoyed bricks.

I avoid the whole business by one very simple method - I don't *have* a mobile phone. Don't need one, don't want one, and find the whole notion of being instantly contactable when I am neither at work nor at home to be thoroughly unnerving. If I'm out of the house, I am *OUT OF CONTACT*, and it's usually for a reason. If I'm really worried about missing your call, I'll buy an answering machine.

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

i like my ring tone when i'm at home, but at work, i enjoy the occassional buzzing of my phone on vibrate. i don't get that many calls, anyway. the person in question, however, does. every time his phone rings i want to shove it down his throat. he picked, like, a really annoying ring tone, too. if it just rang, that would be ok, but it does this little annoying jig. grr.

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

i love my cell phone, but then, i rarely hear it ring. i like having it around just in case -- emergencies, people calling me for important things, etc. the best thing about it is caller ID -- i don't HAVE to answer the call. weeee!

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

i like my phone. i like being in contact -- for my family, friends, professional things, etc. it's extremely useful in all kinds of situations. and i can always choose whether or not to answer the calls because i have caller id. in fact, i prefer my cell phone over my land line because at least i can see who's calling me. "oh, i don't feel like talking to my mom right now...voicemail!" truly a wonderful invention.

also, i can always make a choice to leave my phone on or turn it off, if i want to be out of contact. or just turn the ringer off, and check to see who has called later.

but yeah, ring tones? leave them off at work. it's not that necessary that you hear your phone ring. if you miss a call, oh well, check your voicemail or call log and call them back. big freakin whoop.

[thecolorblue.livejournal.com]

ha ha ha...awwwwwesome.

[infy.livejournal.com]

Can't you drop an anonymous note to your management team stating that the cellphone is interfering with your ability to work?