(no subject)

[the-paco.livejournal.com]

Ahhhh, tea addiction, how I missed thee.
Now that I've been OFFICIALLY promoted (Go me) to my level 2, (Level 3, das ubertech, Bene Gesserit Wizard, Mentor, etc), I can talk to people who are somewhat, occasionally, sorta, almost more gung ho than the customers. So I'm back to drinking a ton of heavily sugared iced tea in levels that makes my bladder scream for mercy.

Makes me hell on chatty techs, though.

Comon techs pop. Pop pop pop. I know they're dragging you out about 1 per month on gurneys, and I hope to add to that, you know why?! DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY I WANT MY LESSER COWORKERS TO FEEL PAIN!!??

I'll tell you why! Because this is a fast industry, and if it's NOT fast, by gods I'll MAKE it fast. I want it fast, it will be fast. It's not a job you get into to skate. It's something that stresses you, drives you, uses you like a girlfriend/boyfriend that is soon to break up with you. I hate the slow, I hate the weak, I hate the idiotic, and anything I can do to help violently remove them from my presence, I WILL DO. And that means doing the job I'm supposed to do fast while hopped up to nigh-illegal levels of sugar and tea. YES! Collapse you weaker being you! YES! I solve 50 issues before lunch! YES! My fingers have been known to bleed! Fuck that, they were weak! They grew stronger! If you can't/won't then you will be replaced! I shall have assertive people or I will DESTROY THE LESSER MORTALS FOR MY OWN SICK PLEASURES! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

Comments

[jahbulon.livejournal.com]

I completely agree O Muad Dib of Tech. We have a guy here on grave shift who is slow to troubleshoot, slow to type and fucking slow to talk. We call him Captain Dishwater because he's dull as..

Real techs move real quick, they don't take ten minutes to reset a password. Real techs rely on intuition and previous experience, not a set of steps to be followed by rote.

I agree! MOVE FASTER YOU BASTARDS

[masonstone.livejournal.com]

Gee... sounds like a hopped up tech sitting two seats behind me...

***turns around***

[the-paco.livejournal.com]

I KNOW NUFFINK!

[greylady.livejournal.com]

You need sugar and caffeine to get that level of fast?...

Poor thing. Soon your body and mind will adapt, and you will be able to achieve that with no assistance other than rage. Do you feel the dark side? It is weak. The TechSupport side makes the dark side look like slightly cloudy glass...

[the-paco.livejournal.com]

Oh, I can do it without, I just don't like doing it for fun. I don't push it just to push it, just to see peoples faces and hear the screams. I push it when I need to.

Aye, the rage used to be what got it, and occasionally it still does, but for this job the rage has been replaced with sad disappointment and increased misanthropy.

[jecook]

I too, can easily invoke my Anti user Berserker rage, but I've been told that it's HIGHLY detrimental to my carreer, so I don't generally use it unless I'm both highly justified, AND have management approval. To date I have not been able to get the latter.. ::sniff::

::takes hit from the caffine jug::

[geekgrrl-ca.livejournal.com]

Meh, I have no handle time, if I have a nice person on the phone I tend to take my time cause well I don't feel like talking to the next asshole in line.

[taleya.livejournal.com]

and if they don't speed up, then by *christ* you will set their arse on fire! MOVE!!

I love how customers have the misconception that tech support is an easy job because we "know everything"

Yeah, we do. But try four staff turning over 500+ customers in a 9 hour shift, and having to get it right every. single. time. and you have my graveyard life.