(no subject)

[the-paco.livejournal.com]

"I don't like your cocky attitude."
Sorry lady, that's what happens when you know what you're doing and have little patience with those who are so emotionally unstable that they're "close to tears" over a damn internet connection. One would think if you valued it you'd learn how to actually work it, wouldn't one? Oh well, logic never really has a place in your worthless little waste of a skull, does it? You just use it to produce and amplify that whiny little-girl-voice that, while endearing in 8 year olds in the 50's, doesn't work so well when you're 60 in 2005. That and your ego. I mean, it must be pretty large if you think I give one sack of trebuchet-launched flaming monkey shit about how you 'feel' about my attitude. I'm not swearing at your dumb ass, consider it the bonus it is and follow directions.

"I'm losing money every minute!"
Oops, please hold.

"The last tech did (this thing totally wrong) and it didn't work!"
And people wonder why I get so arrogant. I'm arrogant because of people like those other techs. I'm just worse at hiding it. I know what I'm doing, they have half a clue, and that still puts us a clue and a half ahead of YOU, dear customer. So shut up, sit down, hang on, and we'll get you off my phone and on the internet. If you don't make an ass out of yourself, you'll be happier. Meanwhile, give me the name of that last tech so I know whos keyboard to shit on during the night.

Unplug the power cable from the modem. It's the black one.
"You want me to unplug what one? The yellow one?"
No, the black one.
"Okay... *rustle rustle rustle*"
Well?
"I unplugged the yellow one."
WTF?

Someones been spiking the water supply with idiocy today.

Comments

[koryweb.livejournal.com]

"I'm losing money every minute!"
Oops, please hold.

LOL. Brilliant! This is one of those things I plan to actually do to a client after delivering my notice.

Perhaps that should be a new post. What would we do on our last day of our techsupport jobs provided we didn't care about references, etc?

[grayhawkfh.livejournal.com]

Gee, and it seems like it was just yesterday that I was being accused by fragbert of leaving access to the "Teh Stoopid" server wide open...

But it wasn't me, I swear!

[caponex.livejournal.com]

Someones been spiking the water supply with idiocy today.

It's not just today.

[infy.livejournal.com]

As long as "today" = "the day computers were mass-marketed and tech support was set up to deal with these idiots", that would be valid, yes indeedy.

[darkblade1.livejournal.com]

I saw that HP was selling a computer for $299. I got upset. I remember saying to my father...

"This is why I talk to morons all day. Their practically giving computers to idiots who don't know shit."

His response:

"Sorry"

That was classic! My dad rocks.

[infy.livejournal.com]

Well, I get the people who are paid not to know shit about computers, their basic usage, or even how to turn them on consistently even though they fucking work with them day in and day out.

Bitter? Me? What makes you say that?
*switching out the -delete- key for the -launch a mini-thermonuclear warhead to this location- key and handing it back to the idjit who spilled their bowl of milky frosted flakes into it*

[darkblade1.livejournal.com]

I'd like to make the keyboard blow up in front of them. Including their hands in the blast. No more happy idiot fun time anymore...

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

"I unplugged the yellow one."

"PLUG IT BACK IN! RIGHT NOW!"

OH MY FREAKING GOD!!

[jedisamui.livejournal.com]

Dude, I almost pissed my pants reading this. HAHAHA. And believe me, sometimes you really want to find the fucktard that gave the luser some bogus info just to get them off the phone and super glue some of their keys on their keyboard.

Pure, clean arrogance. Straight from the bottle. Tasty!

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

"I don't like your cocky attitude."

"That's OK, I forgive you."