Head, I'd like to introduce you to the desk. *thud*

[infy.livejournal.com]

Some of our call center managers have gotten this brilliant idea to have EVERY AGENT ON THE FLOOR contact us rather than using a focal point. We had a massive system outage the other day; if it had been handled properly, it would have been rocky, sure, but we ended up smashing into times that had over 200 calls backing up our queues, for at least an hour.

Hello? We should not be having 20 people from the same unit calling in to state the same message. No shit you can't get in. You just heard that your teammates called in, you do not need to ask "Gee, is there an outage? I can't get into my sessions. Joan and Pete said that they just talked to you." Look, I know you can't find the start button without your hand being held every excruciating step of the way, but use some common sense already!

If 5 people are having the same problem at exactly the same time, ergo...could be an outage. Ya think?!
Designate Person X to be the focal point and make a SINGLE call in, stating who you are, where you are, what problem you're having, how long you've been having said problem, any error messages, and whether you've restarted the program or PC. We'll also need 2 contact people (preferably managers) and their direct numbers. For christ's sake, this is not rocket science. Save us both the going-postal-inducing migraines and take a moment to think before calling in breathlessly and accusatory, and please attempt to let your few remaining braincells and rationality cease trying to exit explosively from your bloated ass. Even if this breaks down to being 1 call from each unit, that's maybe 50 calls, not 5000. We are not staffed for your stupidity or lack of foresight... because if we were, there'd be more of us than there are of you.

There... now that you've nearly averted me from trying to reach through the phone and strangle you, tell me what the freakin' problem is already.

I am so glad I am going on vacation. I have too many bruises and contusions on my forehead from these past couple of weeks.

Comments

[igz00.livejournal.com]

I think a lot of people operate on the theory that the more times they call the more likely it is to get solved sooner.

And for those of us who live in reality, we know that the less often you call the more likely we are to actually have time to get the problem solved.

[greeklady.livejournal.com]

What ever happened to once you know there is an outage to get a message on the HD voicemail for them to listen to when calling in? I mean it doesn't stop all the lusers but it stops some.

[litch.livejournal.com]

best thing to do in those cases is to find someone and have a long leisurely conversation with them until the problem is respolved

[infy.livejournal.com]

"Hot damn, 80 calls in queue? Funny, I really really have to pee. Back in a moment."

Half an hour later...

"Where was I? Oh, by this really odd coincidence, all the bathrooms on the bottom 20 floors were out of service...."

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

Redirect all the callers to the managers.