Too much information?

[reynardo.livejournal.com]

Email
To: Lead Tech Desk
From: Floor rep

My monitor is a piece of crap. Can I have a new one?

-------------------

Email
To: Floor Rep
From: Lead Tech Desk

I wanted a slighty more descriptive output...

-------------------

Email
To: Lead Tech Desk
From: Floor rep

Forsooth, this monitoring bright device
From which the light of far and distant lands
Commingles thereupon with figures bright
Reduced to photons viewed through clearest sand

Full many years has signal passed through glass
Until, with nature's slow and sure decay
The figures once so clear and pure of line
Have quietly begun to fade away.

Solutions to this problem come to mind:
Should one remove the monitor and drop
Upon the concrete this quite fragile case?
Or patiently wait for sight to stop?

I call upon the Techs to see this grue,
Have pity, and to bring me one anew.

I'll let you know what the result is.

Comments

[linguafranca.livejournal.com]

That's beautiful.

*wipes away a tear*

[pisceandreamer.livejournal.com]

For that, ya gotta give him a new monitor.

[greeklady.livejournal.com]

E for effort.

F for being a whiney pain in the ass and can't say the screen is going out. Shit.

[das-prompt.livejournal.com]

I'll let you know what the result is.

New monitor. Totally.

[hangingstar.livejournal.com]

if i got that reply, id so get them a new monitor.
id be glad enough i wasnt being sworn at, but the effort is totaly the selling point.

[the-paco.livejournal.com]

Now THAT is a good use of work boredom.

[ex-prunesnp.livejournal.com]

I think that's awesome.

[reynardo.livejournal.com]

Ohhh - total Persuasion Icon Love! And one of my favourite characters, and favourite quotes *swoon*

Thanks!

[ex-prunesnp.livejournal.com]

I went looking in the text for the quote, and it appears to be movie-only, which is sad. But I do so love that movie.

Re: Thanks!

[reynardo.livejournal.com]

Oh, it's in the text all right. Just slightly changed. Chapter 8:

"But I hate to hear you talking so like a fine gentleman, and as if women were all fine ladies, instead of rational creatures. We none of us expect to be in smooth water all our days."

Re: Thanks!

[ex-prunesnp.livejournal.com]

Thanks again! I was clearly not reading carefully (truly, I was not).

[dr-atheist.livejournal.com]

Give him the monitor!
Fuckit, chuck extra graphics cards in the machine and give him a mulitmonitor all 21" TFT setup

[jahbulon.livejournal.com]

Are you referring to Fuck or Bastard?

[lordstorm.livejournal.com]

Or Now?

[kallell.livejournal.com]

how about

Allah Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches

[compwizrd.livejournal.com]

Dell 2001FP for sure.

Too bad the 2405FPW isn't out yet.

[(Anonymous)]

Just yank out his powerpoints from the floor while he's at lunch then steal his monitor.

[swwinchester.livejournal.com]

OK. The prose is witty and honest, I also vote that there should be a new monitor in his future.

awesome

[solradia.livejournal.com]

New Monitor!! And extra kudos for effort!

[goddessofcake.livejournal.com]

I vote new monitor.

[110billion.livejournal.com]

Two new monitors for that.

[aphrodeia.livejournal.com]

*blinks*

Oooo...

[pygmymetal.livejournal.com]

That's from a floor rep?

Wow, kids, see what a liberal arts degree gets you in the job market.... hee hee...

On the other hand, I swoon at the prose, cause I'm romantic at heart. ;)

Awesome...really...

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

"While clarity's a noble, selfless goal
And all agree your screen's seen better days
Replacement will entail a tale unfold
That's readable by those who have to pay.

The budgeteers are whom you must persuade
To open up their purse and sign the bill
And while some items can be signed away
Still others languish, spurned, and ever will.

So make your case appeal to budget eyes
(Or legal: blindness or OH&S)
You'll find your screen replaced, much clarified
Without the wait of red tape's usual mess.

This smoothing of the way's less noble, true
But face it - at this stage it's them or you."

[reynardo.livejournal.com]

I think I love you.

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

*bows*

[http://users.livejournal.com/shiara_/]

Wonderful. Reminds me of a legal case in the late 1800s where the lawyers bantered back and forth like this.

[okayokayigive.livejournal.com]

My girlfriend fuzzybutchkins, having read both the original post and yours, had this to say:

An LCD, a Plasma screen, a small
investment in the visual health for your
dear user. CRT has rendered all
his worthy quests for blogs and porn obscure.

It's doubtful that Finance will see his plight
as worthy of such high technology.
Against investment, they will surely fight
to mend this problem simply, and for free.

I comprehend the grief of users blind.
Your optimism, though, it gives me pause.
My fingers, cross'd, that your solution find
it's happy end. I fear it won't, because

a memorandum will advise you shortly:
Just set it to four-eighty by six-forty.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

Bravo :)

"Dear Finance, though it grieves me sore to say
New information sad I must convey
I followed your instructions to the letter
In shining hope that all would soon be better

Alas, the screen which once so proudly shone
With data, now has dulled, its spark has gone
For when I changed the settings you suggested
It roared, and sparked, and now of life's divested

And while I thank you for your contribution
I fear that the results of this solution
Have permanently killed the screen in question
And now I plead for purchase intercession

You killed it, so your budget takes the hit
Please overlook the shotgun hole in it."

[jecook]

After I stopped laughing, I'd give you a different monitor. Not a new one, per se, but a different one.

Buying new hardware at my company practically requires a demand from [deity].

[tmercenary.livejournal.com]

See, Poets can get jobs too.

[jcaswell.livejournal.com]

Fantastic :)

[oddball42.livejournal.com]

i think thats the prettiest description of a fadeing monitor i have ever seen...

and yeah if i got that i would give him a monitor.

but id have to mess with his head first, cause im like that.

[--murderer--.livejournal.com]

that's an astonishing response, give them two monitors!