"It won't print!!!"

[xforge.livejournal.com]

Remote to a woman's machine and she's got a web page with the online version of some print publication displayed in some kind of Flash app. Click the Print button for her, at the top of the Flash app, and put in the page range she wants, click OK. Windows print dialog box pops, change settings from Auto Select to Printer Auto Select and save the settings.

Pages print fine.

Woman calls back almost immediately. "Now it's asking me to save a file!" Watch as she clicks File-Print in Explorer, selects Microsoft Office Document Writer, probably without even looking, and clicks Print without even entering a page range. Tell her "if you don't use the print button in the window there, you're going to get unpredictable results" and also politely inform her that she has selected a "printer" that will only create a file and not print anything.

Watch as she does the exact same thing again and listen to her complain that it's not doing what she wants it to. Inform her that if she doesn't do it the way I showed her, she's not going to get the same results I did, and once again inform her that she has selected a "printer" that will not print anything. Listen as she says "oh, well, all right" and hangs up. Tell associates you're not taking calls from that person any more. Walk out back door of office and throw self in front of bus.