The post about Jargon...

[liber-cogito.livejournal.com]

inspired this one.

I don't so much mind the folks that are completely unable to use technical terms. At least, not as much as I mind the ones who consistantly use technical terms incorrectly.

I've had {repeat} calls wherein the techs from the last 5 calls noted the issue as being unable to download files from the internet...only to find out after an hour, that the (l)user meant that the program wouldn't open.

So what are your {least} favorite misuses and misconceptions?
Some of mine are:
"My computer is slow starting up because I have dial up."
Turning off the monitor = turning off the computer.
Programs loading = downloading.

The call I never expected...

[liber-cogito.livejournal.com]

but sort of hoped would happen anyways.

I support an ISP that also is a major content provider. Windows/OSX only, as most are.

Little old lady calls in, must have been like 70.

"I brought my computa to tha computa guye, and he browght it back wif Lin-ux on it. Can I install $program on Lin-ux? Its not windowze, you see."
*mute* OMFG, ITS HAPPENED!!!
"Well, ma'am, what distro, erm...version, of Linux are you using?"
"I don't know, I'm not near tha computa."
"Okay...maybe if I say it you'll recognize it? Red Hat, Novell, Linspire, Mandrake, Ubuntu?..."
"Naw, I don't think so."
"Okay...well...what does it look like?"
"Well...there's a mouse in the corner."
"Okay, lemme put you on hold for a minute."

*confers with only other linux user in the call center, determines that she's using the Xfce Desktop, but still don't know what distro.*

"Okay ma'am...we don't technically support it.... but you can go to our website, and check email...and for chatting...well...there's *Linux based multiclient* that you might be able to find or have the computer guy get you... it is also possible to install from the Mac cd, but it takes some work, and that might be a bit much for you. But again, we don't support $Program on Linux, unfortunately."
"Okay, thanks!"