I needed a laugh today.

[vampireborg.livejournal.com]

$USER: Hi, I was a student there about a year ago and I need my account reset?
Me: OK, I'll send you to Registration, since we can't do that here!
$USER: Great, and I have one more question.
Me: Uh huh?
$USER: I took a DreamWeaver class a couple of years ago, and the page I made came up on Google, and I was wondering if you could disconnect the link so it won't come up in a search.
Me: ... No, sorry, there's nothing we can do about that here, might want to write Google.

Only slightly paraphrased...

[kizayaen.livejournal.com]

Rep: "I'm having a problem with the VPN."
Me: "That's because it's been down most of the evening."
Rep: "Oh, well, it's letting me connect, so it obviously can't be down."
Me: "Well if it's letting you connect, what's the problem you're having?"
Rep: ".... uh.... well, I guess I'm not having a problem anymore. Bye."