Ugh...

[mrsvickie.livejournal.com]

Me - "Thank you for calling The (ISP here) Help Desk, my name is Victoria. How may I help you?"
Customer - "Ah yes, my name is (Insert name here) and I can't connect to www.hotmail.com site."
Me - "Okay sir, you aren't able to access the website www.hotmail.com?"
Customer - "That's right, I can't access it. But I can access every other website."
Me - "Okay sir, we are going to reset your browser settings... Blah blah blah... Delete cookies, files, etc."
Customer - "Okay Done."
Me - "Can you try to access Hotmail please?"
Customer - "I told you I COULD access it, but I couldn't log into my email!!!"
Me - "Well sir, we don't have anything to do with Hotmail. That would be something that you would need to contact Hotmail about this issue."
Customer - "What do you mean? This is YOUR problem. Hotmail is (ISP here)! You need to fix this."
Me - "Can you go to other websites sir?"
Customer - "Yes. But I can't log into HOTMAIL!!! You need to fix this!!!"
Me - "I'm sorry sir but you would need to contact Hotmail for this issue."
Customer - "I would like to be transferred to the local office to be refunded on my lost time with my Hotmail account!"

(no subject)

[drnazo.livejournal.com]

I'm usually not one to quote Dilbert comics or show them off but this one is really appropriate.

I love my job

[boredevilperson.livejournal.com]

UGH! I love people that don't listen to what you're saying.

Him - I'm having a problem with my terminal nothing's displaying
Me - Alright let me reset your port ..... Okay done anything displaying on the screen?
Him - nope just a cursor
Me - Did the screen flash at all or just stayed exactly the same?
Him - Nope it's exactly the same
Me - Alright if you could check the connections in back of the terminal. Unplug them, blow out any dust that may have accumulated (our manufacturing plants have a lot of dust flying around for obvious reasons) and then plug them back in.
Him - I already tried that. It didn't help
Me - Okay do you know where your network room is? I need you to check the portmaster, it's a big white box that would say Livingston PM2ER on the front. I need you to make sure that the cable connected to port 2 is still connected. Someone may have knocked it out on accident
Him - I already looked, it's fine
Me - Are you sure you checked the server closet and made sure it was connected to the big box?
Him - Yes

At this point my BS sense was tingling, I didn't think he really checked but what can you do, he said he checked. So I figured what the hell and I walked him through reconfiguring his terminal which took a bit . . .

Me - Okay now hit Send. You'll find your Send button right below your enter key and right shift key (Yes on these it's where the right control key would be)
Him - I don't see it
Me - It's right under the . . .
Him - Oh! I see it! Send line right? It also says SndMsg
Me - Nope that's on the numerical keypad, you need to look at the ...
Him - I'm pressing it and nothing happens it's not working *click click click*
Me - Okay stop. Look at the key directly to the right of the Send Line button. Now look below it until you find enter do you see enter?
Him - Yes
Me - Now look a little to the left, do you see arrow keys?
Him - Yes
Me - What's directly to the left of the arrow keys
Him - The Send button . . . Is that what I was looking for?

*sigh*

So after we finish configuring the terminal (it did need it anyway) it's still not working.

Him - Hey! I just thought of something that it could be!
Me - What's that?
Him - The cleaning lady was in the room with all our connections I'll bet she knocked the cable out

That about sent me over the edge since I TOLD HIM to look at this BEFORE but I remained calm

Me - Oh yeah I'll bet that's it ("moron moron moron moron moron") Well if you can go in there and you're looking for a large white box that says Livingston on the front. There should only be two cables coming out of it. Make sure there's a cable connected to port 2
Him - Okay let me transfer you in there while I go ....... Okay I'm here. It's the small blue Netgear box right?

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Anyway he hooked it back in (to the correct box) and wow! A login appears.

Ah life in tech support

Asking me about it 15000 times will get it fixed quicker

[rwmidl.livejournal.com]

Yes I know we're having intermittent network problems.
Yes I've notified network support.
Yes we're working on it.
No, asking me and reminding me about it 15000 times will not get it solved quicker.

How do you want to get screwed today?

[coyoteden.livejournal.com]

Heads up about a problem we might see:

Windows XP Service Pack 2 is coming soon. There's a lot of improvement and security features, but be warned:

If you have a less-than-legit copy of Windows XP, you WILL be locked out of your computer if you install SP2

This only applies to Windows XP Pro with a Volume License Product Key (VLK). XP Home is not affected. At all. If you got XP Pro with your computer (OEM) or purchased it (Retail), you're legit and therefore OK. If you have a pirated copy of XP you will find after applying SP2 you will not be able to log on.

Here's why:

If you go into the system control panel, you'll see a number of the format 11111-222-3333333-44444. This is your Product ID, generated from your CD Key. The three-digit group identifies what product this ID is for. On XP Pro Corp the three digit group will be 64x, where x might be number. Legit copies will be 640. In the Gold release of XP anything from 640-649 is valid. When MS found out XP Pro Corp was being pirated, they blocked the two most commonly used product keys from being able to install Service Pack 1.

With SP1, only the two known leaked keys were blocked. They both generated 640, and crackers assumed ALL 640 keys were blocked. Key generators making corporate keys will always generate codes of 641-649. These keys worked... until now. Microsoft has never used 641-649 in any keys so they disabled them. Service Pack 2 RC1 (current Technical Preview) is unaffected, but all builds after v.2111, including the soon-to-come RC2 and the final public release, will not let you log on if your product ID contains 641-649.

To reiterate, and hopefully spare people some grief: If you are using a pirated or keygen-made CD-Key, you will be locked out of your computer after installing SP2!

You will be presented with the windows activation dialog. XP Pro Corp does not have activation, but if you click "Activate" you will be told your key is invalid and be prompted for a new one. After entering a valid key you can log on. In case you're wondering, it doesn't try to phone home. You can change your key and proceed even with no connection to the Internet. If this fails, you can use the old "Telephone" > "Change Product Key" trick.

ObCoveringMyAss: I'm not a warez d00d. I have a legit VLK, but when I said all legit keys were 640, I meant "for most values of all." A few legit VLK do generate 64x and they will need to be changed by M$. That's what happened to me. I researched this because I know a lot of copies of XP pro are going to stop working and we're going to be taking the calls.