Surgical reattachment is a bit out of my scope of support....

[fuego.livejournal.com]

You know you work for a certain fruity computer company when you hear "I lost my dong!" and your first thought isn't "Loreena Bobbit's at it again!" but "Needs a PRAM reset*!"

So I had this call the other day wherein I greeted the customer and asked for his name and he blurts out rather excitedly and impatiently "I lost my dong!"

This wouldn't have been so bad if he had just said it once- my very first thought was, as I said "Needs a PRAM reset!" but as I attempted to get his computer information to log a case, he kept repeating "I lost my dong!" "What happened to my dong?" "Where's my dong?" "Can you give me back my dong?"

I wasn't really able to tell for sure if the guy was saying this on purpose. He sounded about ninety years old (not that old people are incapable of making with the dirty innuendo or anything...), and "dong" is one of the words frequently used by people attempting to mimic the sound of the startup chime on Apple computers, "bong" being the other one that I hear, with about equal frequency. He didn't really sound like he was trying to be all clever and innuendo-y, but one never knows for sure.

In between all this, I manage to get him to calm down and stop babbling about his dong long enough to complete said PRAM reset, which did, indeed, return the startup chime. At which point, he thanked me profusely for giving him back his dong. By the end of the call, I couldn't take another one for about ten minutes.

Comments

[jecook]

Ah, out of the mouths of the innocent... *snicker*

But to be fair, the computer industry has always has a bit of double-entendre and suggestive words: dongle, the whole BDSM angle with Master/Slave, etc.

Either that, or I'm just a sick kitty. :D

[fallconsmate.livejournal.com]

What's wrong with being a sick kitty? ;)

[dreamatdrew]

/me points to that "and" you left on the shelf over there....

[jecook]

:P

[captpackrat.livejournal.com]

Not to mention hard drives and floppy disks...

And don't get me started with fsck....

[penguin-attie.livejournal.com]

Isn't there a t-shirt like that?

look; gawk; find; sed; talk; grep; touch; finger; find; flex; unzip; head; tail; mount; workbone; fsck; yes; gasp; fsck; more; yes; yes; eject; umount; makeclean; zip; split; done;

[ghostdandp.livejournal.com]

Female to Female connector used to often be referred to as a Dyke too. I still remember the first time I asked for a 1/4 inch to 1/4 inch female to female adapter and the guy handed me one and said "here's your dyke" I was all wide-eyed.

[jecook]

Heh. Hearing the term "Dikes" has mildly different connotations for me (i.e., the wire cutter context)

I generally refer to couplers (fnarr!) as gender benders or menders, depending on my mood.

[childofstrings.livejournal.com]

Maybe he was just a dirty old man.

[lihan161051.livejournal.com]

p.s. I'll find my dong ..

http://lostfrog.org/

:D

[jecook]

ROFL.

[cumaeansibyl.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you for reminding me of that.

[dave-iii.livejournal.com]

One of THE specific things I, as a Windows user, have always been jealous of Apple products is that startup sound. So grand, so elegant. *Sigh*

And yeah, "Donnnnnng" is the best way to spell it, innuendo not withstanding. ^_^

[jecook]

I almost never hear it- my mother has the volume on her mac muted, so when I've over at her place working on some trivial thing, I never hear it. :(

[penguin-attie.livejournal.com]

So grand, so elegant.

SO LOUD IN THE LIBRARY. I almost never turn off my MacBook for fear of having to turn it on in a quiet zone /o\

[dave-iii.livejournal.com]

^_^

Well, at least you have the common sense to be embarrassed by that. ^_^

[lihan161051.livejournal.com]

Usually counts for at least one false start when going to safe boot, as well .. :/