(no subject)

[jecook]

Seeing as it's a bit slow here, I've got a poll for the rest of the brethren court:

What's the goofiest/funniest/stupidest marketing gag that your vendors have given to you?

The one I got today was amusing and ironic, considering whom I work for: a largish box of (fake) money, obstinately to get us to buy HP's networking kit. (also completely Not Gonna Happen; We, like a large number of other businesses, are a Cisco shop for our networking infrastructure.)

I'll get pictures posted tomorrow, I think, if anyone wants to see. Also accepting (amusing) suggestions for what to do with it. :D

Comments

[catsidhe.livejournal.com]

A USB cup-warmer.

Basically just a hot plate run off the USB power supply.

I pointed out on the spot that 2.5W wasn't going to go far with heating up much, and a Firewire cup-warmer would have been much faster.

[jjjiii]

Pentium 4 Prescott cup warmer FTW.

[asbrand.livejournal.com]

Gold painted wooden eggs.

I kid you not...



-Az

[tryst-inn.livejournal.com]

A crystal ball from HP. Still have it.

[kuangning]

Is that word really the one you meant to use? "Obstinately" means "stubbornly." "Ostensibly", on the other hand, means something closer to "supposedly".

And I am jealous, for the only marketing stuff I've gotten my grubby mitts on is pens and folders and once a cheap webcam. Really boring!

[johnciall.livejournal.com]

512MB USB Drives from Cisco,

would have been interesting cept they were folowing on from Huawei who gave us all sorts of stuff from 2GB flashdrives, to USB cup warmers, Silk Scarves. It was a bit random

[spooforbrains.livejournal.com]

Very little. Got offered junkets all the time, though, but as an underling thought I really shouldn't take them. Forwarded details on to the MD of our consultancy firm (a Merc driving experience) and he pointed out he could just do a day's billing instead and pay for his own experience where they weren't trying to sell him stuff.

[ptomblin-lj.livejournal.com]

I worked for a company called "Gandalf" that made networking equipment. (Yes, we got sued by the Tolkien estate.)

Towards the end of their existence, they used to pass out sticks of deodorant with the slogan "No sweat networking". Not many people would listen to me when I pointed out that if they wanted "no sweat networking" they should use anti-perspirant, and all deodorant implies is that our networking stinks, but we cover up how much it stinks until the stink overwhelms the cover.

[siliconshaman.livejournal.com]

I think the craziest one I received was from this company, I forget their name but their logo was a cone-shaped thing. They handed out these 'stress relievers'... squeezey high density foam rubber things in the shape of their logo.

All very well, but they had a sort of little stalk and a flat base so they'd sit on your desk, point upwards. So basically, this..thing...they were handing out looked almost exactly like a large purple rubber butt plug.

It was pretty hard meeting the boss somedays, he had one on his desk for ages...and it was only made worse when he'd fiddle with it.

[falnfenix]

nothing. we're not allowed to accept any marketing freebies.

[cheezemeister-x.livejournal.com]

I've got two:

1. A USB-powered, software-controlled missile launcher. It launches foam missiles at whatever target I choose. Usually I choose unsuspecting co-workers. It's got a camera in it that transmits video of the target to my screen so that I can aim. I had the most fun with this a couple weeks ago when I was on vacation. I would remote-desktop into my work machine at random times, fire off a couple shots and then log out. (A collaborator in another department would reload for me periodically.) I don't think my co-workers actually figured out how this thing was assulting them without me here.

2. One rep took me out for lunch.....at a local strip joint. Never made it back to work that day.

[kirolee.livejournal.com]

thinkgeek has the missile launchers. I want one.

[featheredfrog.livejournal.com]

Use the "money" to buy HP Toner Carts. then ebay 'em if you can't use them.

[kayfox.livejournal.com]

Ugh... HP...