Contact page e-mails are the best

[linguafranca.livejournal.com]

(x-posted)

My ISP has a contact page so people can fill out a form to ask us about problems they're having. We received this wealth of information this morning:

I cannot get my [ISP] account opened. It said that there is an unable to
open my account. Can you help me. Thanks [name omitted]

Comments

Re: "I'll try it, but I don't think that's the problem..."

[morningside.livejournal.com]

At least they actually wrote something - at my last job - I'm alas out of work at the moment - we had idiots just forwarding stuff to us without a word. Yeah, thanks for forwarding some bollocks without any explanation of what they wanted us to do with it - I had to stop myself from going over there and just smashing their heads into the keyboard.

Buh... must.. send.. email.

[morningside.livejournal.com]

Actually, now I think about it, maybe we should just remove the actual email link on support pages and leave it as text, so that you have to actually copy it and paste it into a new email. If they can do that, they deserve support - if not, it'd probably too much work trying to do anything with them.

F*ck 'em

[hoffman-log.livejournal.com]

"Descriptive" stuff like that hits my trash can without a second glance. I need more information to help you out and I don't consider it my job to hunt you down. I'm tech support. You call me. Something like that is just about as helpful as answering a phone and having the user say nothing. What would you do then? Hang up? Of course.

_MaH

Proud supporter of the euthanasia of idiots.

Re: F*ck 'em

[linguafranca.livejournal.com]

Yeah, looks like that's what happened shortly after I posted this. I mean, at least proofread, for God's sake. If it had been even slightly coherent, we might have pursued it.

[tjernobyl.livejournal.com]

"Hello! This is the automatic support filter program. As your submission did not contain a question, it has been automatically discarded. Have a nice day!"

[dmsalem00.livejournal.com]

That ranks right up there with...

"Thank you for calling ____ Technical Support, May I have your service tag please?"

"My computer's broke. fix it."

"O...K...do you have your service tag?"

"my what?"

Ad nauseum, ad infinitum.