Dear IT Helpdesk

[commanderd.livejournal.com]

I work 3rd Tier support, so when calls get down to us it's normally because they have assumed the status of "Holy SHIT!!!" or "Fuckit, we got no idea why this is broken", I don't mind it because I love the problem solving and freaking out the men in the office when I can beat them at revolting joke contests....

Anyway..

Todays story concerns the new intake of staff they have acquired at Tier 1 Helpdesk after all the skilled people left when they got shafted by the company one too many times. Their replacements...well I'm still of the impression that a load of rhesus monkeys with simian hemorrhagic fever could do a better job of taking calls than this lot. A user rang up complaining that when they did Shift + 2 they got an @ sign instead of ". Realll simple problem - user's language settings were on US instead of UK. Tier 1 tech tells them to physically take the keys off the keyboard and switch them over as that will 'fix it'.

User has a laptop. This did not end well....

Comments

[ursulagoddess.livejournal.com]

physically take the keys off the keyboard and switch them over

... seriously!?

So do you laugh or cry when you get that ticket?

[commanderd.livejournal.com]

I immediately forwarded the ticket notes to half the techs in our department (application support, I deal mostly with anything Microsoft) which resulted in much laughter.

As for the actual ticket itself, I sent it to the Local Support team for a keyboard repair job.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

... ow ow ow ow.

and people wonderwhy I amreluctant to go into details of what I do in the wonderful world of computers.

[commanderd.livejournal.com]

My mother describes my job to others as "she works with computers but unless you have a major corporate infrastructure she won't fix yours"

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

Your mother is, in a word, awesome. *grin*

I am just glad I can get away with "specialized support" without technically lying :P

[darkmattr.livejournal.com]

I wish my mom would do the same.

[utoxin.livejournal.com]

My parents have developed a shocking level of competence in the years since I left home. They were able to install the wireless router I configured for them with my simple instruction sheet, and have managed not to screw it up in the intervening months. :)

[soruk.livejournal.com]

Same here...

I recently had the job of rescuing data from a Mac laptop that had been drop-kicked.

[commanderd.livejournal.com]

My preferred method of 'rescuing' destroyed computers (and why I do NOT work hardware support..)

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y47/CommanderD/Meandaxe.jpg

[fallconsmate.livejournal.com]

AMAZING stress relief!!! :D

[jecook]

Sexy.

I prefer using old equipment as reactive targets when out in the desert shooting.

[jimbojones.livejournal.com]

The VP of the office I was working for in the late 90s kept insisting he wanted to give me an old Tandy 286 - still working - that he had at his house "to sell, or use for something". Of course, IT WAS A 286, hence couldn't run i386 code, hence was worthless for absolutely anything... but he wouldn't listen. Finally, he just brought the damn thing in and deposited it in my office, despite my protestations.

So I booted it up - just to demonstrate that it still worked - then took it apart and packed it FULL of fireworks, and blew it the hell up as the centerpiece of my 4th of July party that year. Damn thing blew up over and over again for about 10 minutes straight.

[commanderd.livejournal.com]

Oh that is AWESOME!

Must try it...

[xanthrant.livejournal.com]

bwahahahahahahaha!

[commanderd.livejournal.com]

I suggested something similar to the senior boss as an idea for a stress-relieving outing for us techs. He however went for us sitting through several hours of "how to be a more caring tech support person" lecture instead.

Thank fuck for Blackberries, I bet my own personal best time playing chess on that thing that day.

[attackgypsy.livejournal.com]

My father just utterly amazed me yesterday.

He was discussing with me about making everything wireless in the house. Since they only have 1 comp right now, its not needed. But he's planning on a laptop and a second desktop, and wants it all wireless.

He actually asked me why people were so stupid as to leave their routers unsecured. I couldn't help myself. I laughed so hard I nearly wet myself.

(If you knew my Dad, you'd know why. Mr. "I can fix anything with a hammer and a screwdriver" )

[siliconshaman.livejournal.com]

You know, I think I'd find the Tier 1 tech responsible for that, take them by the scruff of the neck and back of the pants, and physically march them out of the door as they have no right to be working anywhere other than a MickyD's !!

[canray.livejournal.com]

You screw your workers, all you are going to find working for you are the screw ups.

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

Time to take over the T1 interview process until there are sufficiently clued T1 reps around to hand it back to?

[caira.livejournal.com]

. . . okay. So, what, even if exchanging the keys *had* worked they'd have wound up with the apostrophe key between 1 and 3. Bloody idiots.

[amynnah.livejournal.com]

Gah...I'm Tier 1 and know better than to tell ANYONE to take apart their keyboard.../facepalm...

Five seconds of Google Searching turned up changing the regional settings in Control Panel. Oy...