Something off my chest

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

I hate Access. Hate it with a blinding, white-hot, fire-of-a-thousand-suns, pointy poison-tipped, unadulterated loathing rage. The mere sight of it makes me want to plant landmines on the road to the home of whomever it was that wrote the program in the first place. Landmines spiked with saltwater and lemon juice so, when they go off, on top of blowing your legs off it really, really, really stings too.


That is all.

Comments

[anivair.livejournal.com]

Clever of you.

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

Hm?

[anivair.livejournal.com]

hating Access. pretty sure it's a point in the "good taste" column.

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

Ahh, thanks then. I'm not surprised so few places still use it.

[xforge.livejournal.com]

Can you spread a few in front of the houses of the team responsible for Microsoft Entourage also?

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

Absolutely!

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

Icon love and agreement.

(Live long and prosper, bitches."

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

One of the top 3 hottest parts of the movie that was.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

So what were the other two for you?

For me, it was the bridge choking. Dear god, the bridge choking.

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

Yes, that. Definitely that. That was...yeah.

And what else...probably Bones in general. He's got a lovely mouth and made me feel guilty for thinking such when I was watching the movie with my husband.

[arabwel.livejournal.com]

I saw the movie, thenwent to Germany. and racked up epic data charges reading nu!Trek fic on my mobile while I was attending a music festival. *facepalm* What can I say? I so agree with the fact that the movie is made of hot.

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

I saw the movie, came home, started re-watching some of the original episodes, and then almost started a petition to have Shatner's girdle from the 3rd season beatified.

[sabine791110.livejournal.com]

I walked out of the movie and said to my husband, "The only thing that would have made it better is if the final scene on the bridge had been shot at shirtless-o'clock." Rawr.

[pyxiwulf.livejournal.com]

ditto

[wxgeek.livejournal.com]

It could be worse. It could be Access's retarded little proprietary web-app brother, Caspio.

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

This is true.

[bothunter.livejournal.com]

No. It could be an Excel sheet that someone has managed to turn into a relational database, using excessive amounts of VBScript and copious use of the LOOKUP function.

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

*hiss, shies away from the eeeevil*

[jecook]

... I think you just described some of the 'sheets that our finance department at $work uses- The ONLY department in the entire company that runs their systems out of memory using excel BY ITSELF. Sheesh.

[trixtah.livejournal.com]

Oh, fuck, we have one of those. Which also pulls data from the Project Server database. Then we get phone calls every month saying "Our 'reports' aren't workingggggggg!!!!1". Will they let me install SQL Reporting Services? No.

I just want to hopelessly corrupt that stinking spreadsheet, and nuke all the backups from orbit. Glargh.

[sethb.livejournal.com]

Every study done on spreadsheets in the real world indicates that over half of all spreadsheets have errors.

[jokergirl.livejournal.com]

Amen.

[outcastspice.livejournal.com]

icon love!

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

Word and back at ya.

[xjems.livejournal.com]

The saltwater and lemon juice bit make this extra awesome.

Access is lame!

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

For some reason it made me want salt-crusted fish of some sort XD

[xjems.livejournal.com]

Ooooh that does sound good =)

[naggy.livejournal.com]

One point in favor of Access is that invariably requires tech support. :)

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

True. Job security is a good thing. +10 optimism.

[sethb.livejournal.com]

No, wait. Tell us how you really think.

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

Well, after that it just sort of degrades into a series of hoots and whistles instead of actual words.

[jecook]

It could be worse- It could be FoxPro. Or, dare I say, Paradox.

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

I haven't worked with either of those - how bad are they?

[jecook]

Access is a shining beacon of light compared to them.

Access was FoxPro's sucessor, although M$ still had the product until version 9.0 was pushed out at some point.

Paradox was one of the competitor's to Access and was bundled with Corel's Wordperfect quite waaaay back in the last 90's (i.e., back in the Dark Ages)

[boogara.livejournal.com]

Access is only as useful as it's user.

I have no problem with it, really...could also be because I found a way to use my PHP skills to write a GUI for it so I never have to open up the MDB's. Either way, YAY!

[trixtah.livejournal.com]

Yeah, so why not use a real database engine... like SQL, MySQL, Postgres or even SQLite?

[trixtah.livejournal.com]

Ooops, I left off Oracle. I wonder why? (Horrible thing that it is)

[crazycatlady.livejournal.com]

My job is just doing over-the-phone support, and this user had never used it before. Insta-doom.

[amynnah.livejournal.com]

I hate Access too.