Argh...

[amynnah.livejournal.com]

Dear End-User,

Telling you over the phone that I'm going to unlock your account for you (so you and I can continue on with our happy, at least in your case, lives), does not translate into I'm going to eat your soul through your eyes and rape your babies. At least, not in the version of English I speak.

/facedesk.

No, I didn't say the part in parentheses out loud. :)

Also, d'you really need to hold a personal conversation with a coworker on your end while I'm sitting there, listening, and watching my queues build? And when I politely try to interrupt to check on you and see if it is working, the correct response is NOT a snapped, "HOLD ON!" ::sighs:: I have a job to do too, damnit.

There is not enough rum in the world for this....

Comments

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

There is not enough rum in the world for this

I heard it was all gone already, anyway...

[hamsterhotep.livejournal.com]

Why is it gone, however?

Perhaps there should be a helpdesk for this...

lj comm="whyistherumgone"

Idea?

[lihan161051.livejournal.com]

Also, d'you really need to hold a personal conversation with a coworker on your end while I'm sitting there, listening, and watching my queues build? And when I politely try to interrupt to check on you and see if it is working, the correct response is NOT a snapped, "HOLD ON!" ::sighs:: I have a job to do too, damnit.

You know, it's all too rare that people appreciate how efficiently we try to use their time, and get them to a resolution without wasting too much of it. And when they get in their own way and actually *actively interfere* with the process of getting the problem fixed, and then blame me for it .. that gets old fast.

("Sir, right now, my first priority is getting this resolved for you so you don't have to have me on the phone any longer. If it were your first priority as well, we'd have been off this call a half hour ago. And I'd still be somewhat sane.")

feh ..

[sethb.livejournal.com]

And when I politely try to interrupt to check on you and see if it is working, the correct response is NOT a snapped, "HOLD ON!"

Try asking "Are you still having any problems?" If they answer something like "HOLD ON!" then thank them for their cooperation and hang up.

[jill-idle.livejournal.com]

yeah, I figure hold buttons work both ways.

[canray.livejournal.com]

Now, eating babies and raping your eyes, that's still an option.

[awarrenfells.livejournal.com]

Well, I think we covered the reason there isn't enough rum is because canray drank it all :P

[canray.livejournal.com]

Well, it was supposed to be rum and eggnog, but I can't drink eggnog, so I just added more rum.

Merry Christmas, all! May your calls be short today!

[hamsterhotep.livejournal.com]

I'm going to eat your soul through your eyes and rape your babies

That's normally implied by "How can I help?"

I have a large collection of souls I check on regularly. You should check on yours...

[eyeamahuman.livejournal.com]

If you cut your rum with something say Coffee and a touch of Creme de Cocao, perhaps it will last longer...

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

"Do feel free to call back when you have time to continue troubleshooting, sir." *click*

[digitalraven]

And when I politely try to interrupt to check on you and see if it is working, the correct response is NOT a snapped, "HOLD ON!"

That is a correct response. One to which you just reply "No", hang up, and then finish the sentence with whatever particular vulgarity you feel like bestowing. It's very important to hang up before the vulgarity, especially when the hebetudinous coprolite is in charge.