Argh...

[amynnah.livejournal.com]

I swear, they all come out on Friday...
Recap: Helldesk at a hospital.


Dear Senior Physicist,

Spending 10 minutes on the phone with me calling me various forms of "idiot" does not excuse you for not noticing the network cable of your "broken" PC is unplugged.

Regards,
amynnah


Dear people who are unwilling to listen to simple instructions,

No, you don't need Support to physically come out and fix your password. Chances are, they'll trip over themselves laughing at you for lacking basic listening skills.

Love,
Me.


Dear customers who can't access the hospital intranet from home,

You guys know that you can't access it from home. It's internal. You call us every other week wondering why you can't access it from home. Maybe, eventually, you'll be able to access it from home, but for now, no dice. Sorry.

Regards,
Me.


Dear customers who call weekly wondering why they can't log into your paystubs,

...same thing. You guys call every week. And it's always the same people (we keep tabs!). You know it's the same password we told you last week. You use that password daily to log into your computers. C'mon. You have brains. Use them, don't abuse them.

Me.


Dear customers who're calling us instead of the vendor,

Yes, we know we're awesome. But we can't reset your password for that one specific program that only three people have access to. It's not hard to pick up the phone and call them, even though their wait times are 50x longer than ours. We have no control over what the vendors do to your passwords.

...and we can't reset your bank account passwords. Sorry. Not happening. We don't work for the bank. We work for $ceo of hospital.

Good luck on your mortgage!
Me.


Dear (other) Support people who stop by my desk while I'm on lunch.

I'm typing on techsupport. I have a burger from Wendy's in my fist, happily enjoying it. No, I'm not going to call users back while on my lunch. You're giving me a headache. I'm not supposed to work on my lunch or I'll get in trouble with $boss, who's sitting over there. Sorry.

Me.


Dear ex-user who was fired last month,

No, you can't check your work email anymore. You don't work here anymore. Call HR.

Me.