Dear Support Monkeys:

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

When we have you fill out a referral form for support, we like to have little things like the machine model type and serial number. Putting "on machine and legible" in the SN field of the request form isn't helpful. If it was legible, then PUT IT ON THE DAMNED FORM.

I hope you all die in a fire screaming like little girls.

--laptop_mechanic 

Comments

[mouse-from-marz.livejournal.com]

what the hell makes anyone think that's a reasonable answer? that's like writing "I have one.. and it's a good one too!" in the Name slot of a application.

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

Its one of the student minions we have manning the software support desk up the street trying to be a smart ass, I suspect. I obviously need pull a Grand Moff Tarkin and get them sufficiently terrified.

[mouse-from-marz.livejournal.com]

do a Samuel L Jackson a la Pulp Fiction - "and you will knooow I am THE LORD!!!! when I lay my vengeance upon thee!"

or a Joe Pesci - "do I look like a clown to you?" on second thought, never mind, that one doesn't really carry unless you shoot somebody in the foot.

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

Yeah, its just not the same effect when you shoot them with frozen paintballs instead. You really need .45ACP to do the job properly.

[wyldthyng.livejournal.com]

perhaps they should be issued paycheques that read "certified and in the company account" on the amount line?

[japester.livejournal.com]

snerck!

Good thing I had not actually just taken the mouthful of tea I had just picked up! My laptop keyboard is safe, only due to good timing!

I like it!

[docskurlock.livejournal.com]

Idiocy reins, I swear.

Now, what's up with your icon? That looks like a great story just waiting to be told.

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

I liberated it from somebody else. Looks like a catastrophic battery failure to me. On an iBook, no less.

[docskurlock.livejournal.com]

Catastrophic enough to be able to take a picture of it as it happens with no one in the way. Sounds staged to me, but still, very cool.

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

There were several well documented instances of lithium-ion batteries catching fire. Chemistry's a little bitch like that.

[docskurlock.livejournal.com]

Kinda like the radios we were introduced to in the Marine Corps. They had a lithium-ion attached to them. We were told very explicitly to never, ever, EVER get them wet. When we asked why, being the stupid recruits we were, they said, "cause it will go boom!"

[jamoche]

They gave Marines something that would go boom and told them not to do it?

[docskurlock.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think they only wanted things that were supposed to go boom on purpose, to actually go boom. Those damn radios cost more than we did, I swear.

[argonel.livejournal.com]

Even worse, they told Marines that something would go boom if it got wet. Then told them not to let it go boom. That is just creul.

[kuangning]

Okay. I just have to say, someone with that icon should not be confusing "reins" (the things with which one guides a horse/carriage) and "reigns" which means "rules/governs". ;)

[docskurlock.livejournal.com]

It was a typo, I swear.

[kuangning]

*grins.*

[docskurlock.livejournal.com]

Uh, it's that stupid g key, it never works....oh wait, it's workin now....lol