(no subject)

[lavabeast.livejournal.com]

Webhosting game. Transcript of LiveChat support, today. Values and hosting service details have been altered.

Me: Hello, I understand that you are having issues uploading. How can I help you today?
Them: I am uploading, and I see the numbers in the bar going up like they do when I pump gas, but it's going really slowly.
Me: How large is the file that you are trying to upload?
Them: It's a 150MB .psd.
Me: This is likely why you are experiencing slow upload time - This is a lot of information to be transfered.
Them: It disconnected me.
Me: *views account details* I see that you are using our basic hosting service. This service has 50MB of total storage. You have been disconnected because your partial upload has filled your storage space.
Them: Should I upload it to a different directory?
Me: Changing the directory will not help. Your account has 50MB of total storage. It is not possible to upload a 150MB file.
Them: I guess I will have to remove my other files and folders and try again.
Me: You are certainly welcome to modify/remove whatever content you wish. However, this will not help. It is not possible for 150MB of content to fit into 50MB of storage space. This is because the size of your file is 3x the available total space.
Them: A friend uploaded my site. I will get them to help me. Bye! *disconnects chat*

I feel sorry for the friend, but at least they were friendly?

Comments

[awarrenfells.livejournal.com]

The square peg doesn't fit into the round hole....
...so hit it with a hammer!

[ravan.livejournal.com]

Dear User,

You can no more fit a 150 MB file into a 50 MB file space than you can fit a semi truck into a compact parking space. In both cases it requires severe compression.

Thanks, your hosting company.

[dukesnorre.livejournal.com]

Oh man, you have the lol/wtf ligatures from typophile. :D ^5 (or here I can do ⁵, I guess!)

[mediavore.livejournal.com]

150MB of shit in a 50MB bag.

[snarl817.livejournal.com]

You beat me to it!

[pne.livejournal.com]

Since they talked about "pumping gas", perhaps you could have compared it to trying to put 150 gallons of gasoline into his car's tank... then asking him whether he thought it would help if he removed the gasoline that was already in his tank.

[wyldthyng.livejournal.com]

my thoughts exactly.

or 3 pints o' beer into a pint glass. he'll understand beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrr!!!

[emerald-embers.livejournal.com]

Aww :). I had something similar recently with an equally friendly customer - the file they wanted to send in an email was 15MB, we have a 10MB file size limit on emails. The customer said "It's in a zip file, does that make any difference?", had to explain that if it's 15MB in a zip file it's still 15MB and can't be sent, they'd have to send two smaller emails instead.

They were lovely though, of the "Well, thank you for explaining why that wasn't working :)" sort.