HP CSN: Our Ability to Suck Knows No Bounds.

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

So we do warranty repairs on buisness line models from HP/Compaq. All our claims processing must be done through their CSN website. This website was apparently coded by a squadron of LSD tripping monkeys. The website requires an ActiveX control to work, so is usable with IE only. The website frequently refuses to load at all and there is a blinding array of tabs and fields to navigate, and the information is not laid out in anything remotely resembling a clear, concise manner. Each claim has certain bits of information that are required before it will let you close it so that the labor reimbursement will be processed.  You have to put in things like what you did, what you ordered, when the failure happened and when the work was completed.

Here's the kicker tho. If it doesnt like what you typed for whatever reason, YOU CANT GO BACK AND EDIT IT. A persistant popup saying "invalid data type" (or something along those lines) comes up, and when you close it to go back to the mistyped entry, it pops up AGAIN, prohibiting you from actually editing anything. The only way out is to kill IE from the task manager and start over. And the website is IE only. The default answer when you encounter a problem is "call CSN support".  However, I dont speak spanish at all well, and that is apparently the first language of everybody in the CSN support queue.   Their accents are all thick enough to cut with a knife. I know phone support jobs are cheap, but if they cant speak english clearly and  concisely, they shouldnt be tasked with providing support for english speaking users.

Late breaking news: Apparently all these errors are directly related to IE7, as the site works fine in IE6. The idiots should just come out and SAY SO, not pretend it works on both.

The idiots responsible for this abortion of code need to be fed feet first into a wood chipper as an example to others.

Comments

[museology.livejournal.com]

I'm sitting in my biology class, listening to a professor drone on about global warming, and I nearly started laughing at your wood chipper comment. Thank goodness for my ability to bite my lower lip and snicker.

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

Heh. I'm glad you liked it. Its my stock "make an example of something" saying.

[canray.livejournal.com]

I've used it a few times as well, in Paranoia no less.

"If you can prove your innocence, however, The Computer have mercy." "I won't be executed?" "No. You'll be fed in head-first."

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

I've encountered more than a few custom apps that were broken to hell by the automatic IE7 upgrade last year.

And a few that refuse to run in IE7 under Vista, even when you turn sandbox mode off. IE7 under XP is just fine, apparently.

*shrug*

I consider it just more reason to use open platforms, but that's just me.

[laptop-mechanic.livejournal.com]

I don't disagree. I personally loathe ActiveX, but its not like we can dictate terms to the companies we have to do work for. They're the ones that wrote the tools we have to use, like it or not.

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

kinda just makes me want to get in the business of helping crappy hole-in-the-wall outfits migrate their shitty activex code over to perl or php or java or something a little less prone to suck.

[mattcaron.livejournal.com]

- perl is for quick and dirty sysadmin tasks
- php is for a little bit of dynamic content

Neither is suitable for robust web applications.

Stick with Java or C#/Mono for that. Strong typing and compilers make a world of difference.

[jimbojones.livejournal.com]

one Browser to rule them all, and in the darkness bind them...

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

I use lynx and links regularly. Blows my coworkers' minds, usually, cept for the ones who already have clues.

[jimbojones.livejournal.com]

FF2 with AdBlock is about as low-tech as I really care to go, generally, unless of course you count judicious use of fetch, wget, and/or telnet for special purposes.

None of the above of which helps when you're faced with a business critical web app that was only designed for The One True Browser.*

* little-known fact: the One Ring was chock full of bugs. What, you thought making hobbits invisible was a fucking feature?

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

ell oh ell :)

Lynx/links come in handy when trying to do a quick test of webserver response from IP addresses that I know client firewalls don't have explicit allows set up for (i.e. my home linux machine that I can ssh to, or another guy I know's linux machine down in Florida). It's simply amazing how frustrating it can be to diagnose a firewall problem that's disguised as a webserver/mailserver problem, doing the troubleshooting from our office when our office is explicitly allowed through the client firewall for any and all traffic.

[freakbarman.livejournal.com]

Oh god do I feel your pain. I worked for a warranty provider for 2 years. That !@%&*%$ website it a piece of crap. It's bad enough if they left it alone, but are constantly changing it to and nothing they ever did worked for the first 4 months it was out.

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

I used to have about 20 posters of your icon, and they were all torn up/stolen/lost during the apartment moves I've made over the past 10 years :( I wonder if more are available. Always loved that picture.

[freakbarman.livejournal.com]

I haven't been able to find any posters anywhere. I am contemplating making some.

[guinevere33.livejournal.com]

My smite icon lives! I love it when it turns up in random places.

And yes, IE7 is the devil.

[tophee.livejournal.com]

I feel your pain. I used to be a warranty tech for HP too. :(

/toph

[zonga.livejournal.com]

http://www.joelonsoftware.com/items/2008/03/17.html

[syberghost.livejournal.com]

HP will NEVER fix the Spanglish problem. They bought the callcenter in Costa Rica they use, and are busily moving ALL their Tier 1 support there, as well as running it as a profit center serving other customers.

It's all just part of the gigantic pile of FAIL that is HP.

Right on

[repairguynj.livejournal.com]

I repair, or at least used to repair, HP Warranty units as well. Now you can't even get the service manuals anymore. I feel for the unfortunate souls who buy HP printers thinking they have a warranty. It may be under Warranty but good luck finding a authorized repair facility willing to deal with it. HP, CSN and their service delivery tool are on par with Microsoft Millenium edition.