(no subject)

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

(crossposted in my own LJ)

this is a bit offtopic, my apologies, but...well, here's the backstory.

When I'm not fixing printers, reinstalling Outlook, or otherwise doing some form of user support, one of my hobbies is working on cars. Not hotrodding, not custom body modification or to-spec restoration...just good, basic maintenance to keep my car running well forever (or for as long as economically feasible).

I'm currently staring at a couple of old air-cooled volkswagens, and will be tearing into their engines here in the next few weeks. As I read literature about them to get myself prepared for the task, I have found one book in particular, "How to Keep Your Volkswagen Alive: A Manual of Step By Step Procedures for the Compleat Idiot" by John Muir (this book is old enough and in a layperson-friendly-enough style that I think it just might be the book that started the "Idiot's Guide to $FOO" meme that has been so pervasive for the past decade or two). This book is an absolute gem.

This book starts out with a chapter on how to use this book, which starts with basic instructions for FOLLOWING INSTRUCTIONS, and oh em gee, I think I want to plagiarize this section, change "car" to "computer", adjust other language where necessary, and start sending it to all my tech support clients. And I think every manual for everything, ever, should start with a chapter a lot like this.

At any rate, I get a kick out of reading it, and I think other folks here might also.


Another excerpt from How to Keep Your Volkswagen Alive by John Muir.

From CHAPTER I: HOW TO USE THIS BOOK

PROCEDURE ON HOW TO RUN PROCEDURES

Condition: You are going to run a Procedure.

Tools and Materials: ability to read basic English, ability to follow directions without adding embellishments or deleting parts of the steps. Short cuts, whether your or a friend's idea must be avoided -- same with long cuts.

Remarks: A procedure is designed to give step-by-step instruction for the performance of an operation with a minimum of thought, proficiency and ingenuity on the part of the personnel. The writer assumes nothing and tries to include every contingency.

Step 1. Analysis
Read the procedure all the way through before you start. This will familiarize you with the problems and prepare your head for the operations that will be required.

Step 2. Preparation
Get all the tools and materials needed for the procedure together, prepare the location by maybe sweeping the area before putting the car there. Have the blocks and safety equipment ready. Make sure there is hand soap and rags, things like that. If the procedure calls for help, make arrangements with a friend. Arrange for any needed transportation.

Step 3. Safety
Cars can be dangerous and deadly weapons. They kill more people by accident than are shot on purpose. Keep your eye on your cute little bug and your wits together when working in and around its machinery. Especially when it's running; spinning and sparkling, be super aware. A reader wrote us that it took his Bug, with a half a tank of gas, a few seconds less than 10 minutes to be consumed to nothing (zilch) by fire.

No matter how tired, cold, miserable or pissed off you are, don't make "border line" decisions against safety and for convenience.

As we couldn't possibly think up every bizarre situation you might run into, we're listing a few "regulars."

Carbon monoxide kills, so never run the engine in an enclosed garage or other building without plenty of ventilation. (This is suicide!)

Gasoline burns fast and well; that's why it's such good fuel for internal combustion engines. Make sure to wipe up all drips, spills, puddles, etc., right when they happen, especially when working around the engine compartment. And don't light matches. Beware of the combination of spark and gas. By the way, use a professional drop light with a wire or plastic cage or shield around the bulb when lighting up the engine compartment, and don't hang it where it will drop. The hot filament of a broken bulb can cause gasoline to ignite.

Take off all jewelry, including rings (finger, nose, or ear). Also remove scarves, neckties or any loose clothing and tuck long hair into a stocking cap when working on a car. A friend of ours had just finished doing a valve job, the engine was in and she started it with one turn of the key, when she went to the back to admire her engine and her prowess. She spaced out about her long, loose hair and leaned in to get a better look. A piece of that beautiful black hair got caught in the pulley and was yanked off her scalp. Fortunately, John was there with the instant reaction to turn off the key. She looked at that hank of hair, about 1/2" in diameter with some scalp on it, and tied it to the handle of her engine compartment as a reminder. For months we saw that little red bug, with the pony tail flying behind it, zipping around Taos.

When you need to support the car to work under it, support it well on level ground. Use good firm wooden blocks or good quality jack stands to block it. We definitely don't recommend using cinder (cement) blocks, but if you're caught in an emergency and there's nothing else, make sure the holes in them go up and down, and not sideways. None of us would ever get under a car held up by cinder blocks.

Use safety goggles if there's any chance a piece of flying metal (maybe even dirt) could land in your eye.

If while you're working you have loose and dangly wires hanging around, disconnect the battery ground strap.

Having a fire extinguisher around may be handy, but we hope you'd never have to use it.

Most important -- KEEP ALERT AND AWARE!

Comments

[ohmyhead.livejournal.com]

You lost me at "manual".

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

HAH. That topic came up this weekend between my dad and I, as we were elbow-deep in valve stem oil seal replacement on a 94 toyota tercel. There was his way of doing it, which took us 4 hours and a lot of swearing and busted knuckles and four hands last time we did it, or there was my way of doing it, which took 15 minutes, not counting the extra 15 minutes I spent re-re-re-reading the directions and paying close attention to the exploded detail view and going "AHA! If I use a small enough screwdriver to fit through both sides of the spring clip, I bet I can do this all myself a whole lot easier!"

And I did.

He admitted that he can't stand to have to read the manual.

Whereas I adore technical literature :)

[betawriter.livejournal.com]

Whereas I adore technical literature :)

Thank you. :)

- From someone who writes technical manuals for a living

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

:D

I've bought manuals for stuff I've never even worked with. Quite a library I'm accumulating.

And I never throw manuals away.

[jecook]

*looks at the PCL5 manual 'borrowed' from some employer somewhere that was tossing it*

I hear ya there.

My pocket HTML reference has gotten a lot of useage, though. lil bugger is a lifesaver.

and when working on firearms, especially old mil-surps that have been packed in several decades worth of smelly cosmoline, a manual with clear pictures on how stuff goes togather is a godsend.

(or even newer milsurps: the CZ83 manual I have was quite handy when I took my pistol (a CZ82, the military/LE version of the 82 chambered in 9mm Makarov) apart to see why it didn't like to of the four magazines I have for it...)

[ravenofdreams.livejournal.com]

I've got manuals for hardware I don't own, and software I've never supported - but when I suddenly have to, things like that book on XSan (in its convenient storage space in my car in the work parking lot) are invaluable.

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

I would not be nearly as effective at my job if it weren't for the piles of stuff I keep stashed in my truck. Just in case, for when they're needed.

[mattcaron.livejournal.com]

I like manuals on the internet, because I print them out and read them while I'm waiting for the brown truck to bring my shiny new bit of kit...

[thebobby.livejournal.com]

This is something I hate; why do people use the manual as the last resort, not the first? As a tech, in a team of techs, why is the usual 'joke' "He must be desperate, he's reading the manual!"

There was a time people wrote useful manuals for everything, but I'm noticing now that a lot of things get little more then a basic readme? Why? Because of all those people who don't bother reading the manual anyway!

As someone who reads the manual first, before attempting to use whatever, this frustrates me no end.

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

I do find that for most tasks, I have to dive into it a bit and try it before reading the manual makes any sense. It is good to read, and it is good to try it out, and there is no one correct way to always do one or the other first.

Use common sense, I think, shall be the order of the day.

[trixtah.livejournal.com]

Because a lot of manuals don't have straight-forward instructions on how to do Task X. You get a whole swodge of specifications, obscure rigmaroles that you'll never use, and finding the actual information you want is almost impossible given the amount of cruft you need to work through.

I'm not thinking of Unix man pages or perldocs, oh no no no (I have to admit the more recent perldocs and man pages are better).

While it's important to have all the possible permutations and information there, some examples of typical procedures (ranging from simple to moderately complex) can be incredibly handy. As are well-though-out tables of contents, and OMG indexes/keywords.

[deusmetallum.livejournal.com]

Support calls will now all start like this:
$Help_centre, Deusmetallum speaking, how many I help? Please be aware of the following before explaining your problems: you must have an ability to read basic English, ability to follow directions without adding embellishments or deleting parts of the steps. Short cuts, whether your or a friend's idea must be avoided -- same with long cuts.

Any book that includes definitions of front, back, left, and right is a definite winner.

[margaretc.livejournal.com]

I had a VW Bug and this book in high school and college, and although I managed to kill it on a mountainous interstate on a dark January night, it was emphatically NOT because of this book. It was because I hadn't re-re-re-read the oil-change procedure (I had an oil screen) and because of that the screen blew one of its 6 bolts. I figured I knew what I was doing, and didn't have to reread the manual. Scratch one car. I do find that this manual is very much the basis of my support and tech mindset - stop, take a look, review what you know and don't know, get what information you can, and read ALL instructions. I've also written a large number of techsupport documents, and I always write at this level, even when I'm writing for myself.
I still fight the tendency to say 'ah, I know how to do it,' and not read the instructions, but when I get stuck, I come back to the manual and then go 'ah! That's how!!!', something like 95% of the time.

Re: Any book that includes definitions of front, back, left, and right is a definite winner.

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

A 71 superbeetle and 78 bus will be my projects this summer (and hopefully my transportation on the big road trip I want to take).

[zendequervain.livejournal.com]

That reminds me of an awesome book that was given to a friend at a baby shower.

For the husband, someone gave a baby manual something like this one (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Baby-Owners-Manual-Instructions-Trouble-shooting/dp/1931686238), that explains everything about caring for a baby as if it were a car. It even uses technical terms for anatomy like exhaust and intake valve. Very very amusing.

[antikythera.livejournal.com]

I have the book in that series that's about cats. XD

[ravenofdreams.livejournal.com]

That kind of book should be required reading before anyone is allowed to turn a computer on.

[sdaemon.livejournal.com]

Computers can be dangerous and deadly weapons. They kill more people by accident than are shot on purpose.

Not true, methinks, but that sure is fun to say. And maybe a good dose of caution would do our userbase some good!