(no subject)

[canray.livejournal.com]

Alright, I was working "Tier 2.5" a little over a year ago, a Specialist Support department (Wireless Networking), however, most people just saw, "Oh, they're Tier 2. They know more than we do, transfer to them if it's strange or technical!"

So we got the weird and wonderful calls.

Including this one:

Woman calls in, guy in the background talking (Unable to make out, not sure if was cursing or not). She's totally pissed off because the Tech just switched the Cable Modems (Neither one of which the Wireless Sets that I'm supposed to support, BTW!), and now there's no more music coming from the router. (Both were Motorolla Surfboards of various models, if you want to look them up.). From Cable Modem to Cable Modem, so it wasn't like it was an old Voiceband Modem that sang a little song when connected.

Me: "Ma'am, there's no speaker in that style of modem, it's not supposed to make noise when connecting and..."

Caller: "No no no! It's not playing our music, or any sound from our games, or anything."

Me: "Oh... That would come out of your speakers, not your modem. The Speakers might have gotten disconnected when..."

Caller (*VERY* Adamantly!): "We don't have any speakers. The sound has ALWAYS come from the modem YOU provided."

Me: "Not possible. I can see each of the types of modems you have, am looking at the spec sheets, from the manufacturer, right now. There are no speakers or any other form of sound production devices in the unit."

Caller: "Are you calling me a liar?"

Me: "No, misunderstanding the names and purposes of computer equipment, maybe, but never a liar. Now, if you could..."

Caller: "NO! It came from the Modem, get him BACK HERE NOW TO FIX IT!"

Me: "Are you able to get onto the Internet?"

Caller: "Yes..."

Me: "Then the issue with your Internet connection is resolved. The Modem has nothing to do at all with sound on your computer, you can go to the OEM website, that's Motorolla by the way, and find that out yourself. If you have no issues with the Internet, I will have to move on to other callers that have issues pertaining to our services."

Caller (Huffy): "I will have to call that guy."

Me (After a heartbeat for an explaination of 'That Guy'): "OK then, you go call that guy. Thankyouforcallingandhaveaniceevening."

I mean, really. Speakers are *NOT* a new invention, people!

Comments

[canray.livejournal.com]

Found it. A bit different than I remember it. I'm positive about the Modems and the guy in the background: http://community.livejournal.com/techsupport/1015788.html

'Course, it could have been one of my Co-Workers trying not to curse out loud. ;-)

[canray.livejournal.com]

And my old Intro Post, which is another good story.

http://community.livejournal.com/techsupport/992149.html

[teriwyn.livejournal.com]

Hmm. Tier "2.5". And a separate group for Wireless subs.
*sing-songy* I bet I know who you work for!

You've my condolences. I got out of there years ago.

[canray.livejournal.com]

'Bout a year and a half out now.

[teriwyn.livejournal.com]

My favorite story from that place. (Was posted here years ago, Not that I feel like digging it up when I can just retype...) One time, a guy got his own modem, and it didn't work because it wasn't provisioned. He didn't know he had to provision it. Did he call us and ask us why it might not work? Nooo.

But he doesn't want to pay modem rental anymore. So he gets this bright idea that he'll return his brand new modem to us. Which if you think about it, makes him a real asshole - he thinks he's giving us a brick that he bought.

He goes so far as to peel off the sticker with the SN and MAC addy from the rented modem and slaps it on the one he's going to give us, then returns it.

A few days later when they pull the old modem off his account (you know, because he "returned" it) and it stops working, he calls.
It gets worse. Because the modem he turned in didn't have the right SN and MAC on it, Warehouse provisions and tests it, it "doesn't work" (because you know, the MAC addy is wrong), and so they mark it as BAD in Cable Data.

I ended up on the phone with the warehouse manager, got him to understand what happened, and of course he cursed the customer for his fraudulent ways. In the end, they got it all sorted out I think, but I'm pretty sure we told the guy he had to go down to the Warehouse himself with our modem and I'm pretty sure the Warehouse manager gave him a load of shit over it.


I don't know why I felt compelled to share that story now. Maybe because I know you will understand. Mm... the Vodka might've had something to do with it, too.

[canray.livejournal.com]

OK... You swapped your modem with your Mother's, because hers wasn't working, yours was, and you're on vacation...

Why did you bring your modem on vacation across the country? Oh, because your mother's wasn't working. Right.

So... You're back home with your mother's broken modem, and want a tech to pick it up.

OK, this is messed up five ways from Sunday.

[syberghost.livejournal.com]

The one thing I'm thinking is, maybe it was hooked up USB instead of RJ45, was through a USB hub, they had a USB sound device as well, and for whatever reason it wasn't hooked back up during the service?

Call that the 1% chance this customer isn't completely insane. I'm being generous with that number, I realize.

[canray.livejournal.com]

I highly doubt that.

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

Caller: "Are you calling me a liar?"

How many times have we wanted to answer "YES!" ?

[canray.livejournal.com]

Every. Single. Time. *Grinds Teeth*

[kerberos.livejournal.com]

In the "GOOD" old days some bastardos used to sell computers with a combined modem/soundcard.

IBM aptiva series and so on did that.

Which was a biatch since they also put that in the ibm in the ONLY PCI slot available. The rest was ISA slots. ugh.

[canray.livejournal.com]

I've heard of these after the call, and it was put forward by people on the floor that this could be it.

So I checked, nope, customer for well over two years, high speed service only, no dial-up.

Go back to Fail, go directly to Fail, do collect 200 LARTs to the Head.