Arg!!!!

[geekgrrl-ca.livejournal.com]

Me: Ok what we want to do is restart the computer.
Them: But it's already running.
Me: Yes, we want to reset the computer by restarting it.
Them: But it's already running and I'm logged in.
< Head Desk>

Comments

[major-error.livejournal.com]

you: Then we've reached an impasse and this call cannot continue. Please call back when you're more inclined to follow directions. Good bye. *call ends*

[gilmoure.livejournal.com]

To: My Customers

Yours is not to reason why!

Yours is but to do and (hopefully) die.

Thanks,

Tech Support

[tanetris.livejournal.com]

That's why it's called "restart" and not "turn the goddamn computer on".

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

Heh. I've learned that you never say what you're going to try and do or accomplish next, simply keep giving a running list of instructions. When the computer's doing something time-consuming like rebooting or a caller's likely to object because they've been asked to do something they once thought they heard a friend of a friend talking about (like rebooting), they can often be distracted by telling them that you'll need them to read off the screen items as they come up in the next 30 seconds.

It gets them thinking about that task rather than what they're typing or clicking, and even if you don't need the screen info (which, 99% of the time, you won't), it keeps the caller off-balance and clicking along nicely in dummy mode.