The stupid it hurts

[katballou.livejournal.com]

Yesterday my phones were full of the crazy, today they're just full of stupid.

I just got off the phone with this one.

Me: And this is a problem with your Hewlett Packard Computer?
Stupid customer: My what?
Me: Is this on the Hewlett Packard?
SC: No it's an HP
*head desk*
Me: Ok your HP computer. What kind of problem are you having?
SC: It's giving me this screen with all sorts of words on it.
Me: Ok.... What kind of words?
SC: Oh I don't know
*head desk*
*head desk*
*head desk*

Thank god it turns out he wasn't under our warranty and I got to send him to Hewlett Packard.


I have so many more from the past few days but this is all I have time to type between calls.

Comments

[canray.livejournal.com]

"I don't know what it says."

"What? You can't read?"

"Well..."

"And you bought a computer when you can't read."

"Look, just help me."

"OK. Turn off the computer and join a class in learning how to read."

[toxico.livejournal.com]

This would be a bad time to say you have PMS, wouldn't it?^*

[katballou.livejournal.com]

Die in a fire :p

[superbus.livejournal.com]

I'm surprised you guys are even allowed to browse Livejournal at work; my company tries to lock down everyone pretty harsh with Websense.

Of course, since I am in charge of our Websense server... certain rules don't apply to me~

[ruvane.livejournal.com]

At our place, our filters went down about a month ago, so it's been free reign since then. Well, I don't know if you can go to every site, cause I stay off the adult ones and such, but LJ, Myspace, and pretty much everything else is up. I'm a pretty happy camper. :)

[wherdafux-d-cat.livejournal.com]

[ruvane.livejournal.com]

Cool, gotcha.

[major-error.livejournal.com]

Looks like this one is an escapee form the American education system...
>.>

[snarl817.livejournal.com]

It's not a Hewlett Packard...it's a Harry Potter.


Sometimes, I wish new computers would come with a large knife. That way, when a customer calls tech support and says something THAT willfully stupid, the support rep can order them to take out the knife and commit seppuku.

"No, sir, trust me, this WILL fix your problem. No, sir, the problem with your computer is YOU, and we need to fix that. Yes, sir: in, twist, and up. No, sir, I'll stay on the line so you can't bother the nice 911 operators with your stupidity."

[thudthwacker.livejournal.com]

It's giving me this screen with all sorts of words on it.

You've heard the phrase "a bark of laughter"? Never made one before, m'self. Just did. Very loudly.

[forever-damned.livejournal.com]

Reminds me of the tickets I get sometimes for my on-site jobs.

"Customer is getting weird errors".

What sort of weird fucking errors? Most errors are "weird", thats why they are errors! Then I turn up, can't replicate the problem and ask the customer what the error was.

"Dunno". How many times did you get it? "Heaps". Did you write it down at all? "Nup."

*STAB*

[unapro.livejournal.com]

There is an hp program in the call center I work at. They are sales thought.

I worked for gateway for a bit, It was mega hell. I feel your pain.