!@#!@#$%!@#% STOP IT!!!!

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

CHRIST, stop sending me this BOOOOSHIT!!!!

this is the THIRD one of these work orders i've received in the past two weeks.
WTFLYINGF!??! STOP IT!!!! i dont even get out of the damn chair for this bs.

Summary:
PC is running slow. Please do any standard maintenance on PC
Workstation id:
10681
Computer:
Intel Pentium MMX 166.00 MHz
Windows 98 A
31.5 MB RAM

aASd;flasl;fasjkl;asdasd;'as ;AAAUUUUGGGGJHHHHHHH

i'll show you fucking STANDARD maintenence ... where's the hammer...

Valis

EDIT:
my bad actually, i think my posts completely obscurred the point.

the user calls the helpdesk.
the helpdesk "troubleshoots", gets information, even remotes in if they think they can fix the problem.
if they can't, they make a work order for me.

THIS is what the HELPDESK sent me. i'm not yelling at the user, i EXPECT this sort of thing from the user, i'm yelling at the HELPDESK!

WHY they didn't inform the unit that this thing was beyond hope escapes me...

Comments

[inahandbasket]

toss 'em a quarter and tell 'em to get a real computer.

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

*headdesk*

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

my bad actually, i think my posts completely obscurred the point.

the user calls the helpdesk.
the helpdesk "troubleshoots", gets information, even remotes in if they think they can fix the problem.
if they can't, they make a work order for me.

THIS is what the HELPDESK sent me. i'm not yelling at the user, i EXPECT this sort of thing from the user, i'm yelling at the HELPDESK!

WHY they didn't inform the unit that this thing was beyond hope escapes me...

[compwizrd.livejournal.com]

i still have about 10 machines at the office that are p120-133, 32 meg ram, windows 98.. two or three are win95.

apparently the 11 year replacement cycle isn't long enough...

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

NOPE, gotta squeeeeeze every bit outta em!

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

my bad actually, i think my posts completely obscurred the point.

the user calls the helpdesk.
the helpdesk "troubleshoots", gets information, even remotes in if they think they can fix the problem.
if they can't, they make a work order for me.

THIS is what the HELPDESK sent me. i'm not yelling at the user, i EXPECT this sort of thing from the user, i'm yelling at the HELPDESK!

WHY they didn't inform the unit that this thing was beyond hope escapes me...

[xforge.livejournal.com]

Okay, I was gonna say, "Ah wtf, run a spyware killer and clean out their Temporary Internet Files," then I noticed that it's a PENTIUM ONE running at A HUNDRED SIXTY-SIX FRICKING MEGAHURTS with THIRTY-ONE MEG OF RAM. Jesus God save me from these MORONS!!! "Standard maintenance" on that computer happens to be "drop kick it into the dumpster and GO BUY A NEW MACHINE!!!!" Holy f*ck!!!!

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

yes. and it's running slow.

AAUUGGHH

they should be happy it's warming the room slightly

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

my bad actually, i think my posts completely obscurred the point.

the user calls the helpdesk.
the helpdesk "troubleshoots", gets information, even remotes in if they think they can fix the problem.
if they can't, they make a work order for me.

THIS is what the HELPDESK sent me. i'm not yelling at the user, i EXPECT this sort of thing from the user, i'm yelling at the HELPDESK!

WHY they didn't inform the unit that this thing was beyond hope escapes me...

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

lol, if anything i'm way toooo tolerant!

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

my bad actually, i think my posts completely obscurred the point.

the user calls the helpdesk.
the helpdesk "troubleshoots", gets information, even remotes in if they think they can fix the problem.
if they can't, they make a work order for me.

THIS is what the HELPDESK sent me. i'm not yelling at the computer, i'm yelling at the HELPDESK!

WHY they didn't inform the unit that this thing was beyond hope escapes me...

[toxico.livejournal.com]

One of our guys found an almost guaranteed way to get people here new computers if they do indeed need them: Assuming it's not a BYO job, look up the manufacturer and model on eBay, print off a list of how much they are going for and place it on a higher-up's desk (one with pull in this area, mind you) with notes reading "THIS IS MY PC" and "THIS IS HOW MUCH OUR CRITICAL OPERATIONS ARE WORTH RIGHT NOW," also with accompanying arrows and circles.

This method is currently helping cycle out the Dell GX150s we still have floating around.

[vortex.livejournal.com]

Oooooh!
That's a good one!...

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

lol, we had something similar a great while back. damn thing wouldn't die.

someone grabbed a screwdriver (rubberhandled) and bridged a couple of transistorsw in the power circuit of the mobo.

loud POP

awww... darn thing died...

[vxo.livejournal.com]

I remember there being a fairly large push at my old community college back in 2002 to replace all computers under 200 mhz... the replacements were all used Dell Optiplex GX series, I have no clue where they got them all (probably off the back of some freighter in the miami river). Those same beige >500 mhz Optiplexes with 6 gig hard drives and 128 megs of RAM are probably all still there.

*shudder*

[vxo.livejournal.com]

I figure I should also mention what they did with the old ones ... they packed them into unused closets and mechanical rooms. There are machines dating back to 286's in there. XD

[abstrak-tokatl.livejournal.com]

wait... what?

i'm runing 600 mhz dual celeron at home and i feel ancient. 166??? what do you use that for? mame?

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

my bad actually, i think my posts completely obscurred the point.

the user calls the helpdesk.
the helpdesk "troubleshoots", gets information, even remotes in if they think they can fix the problem.
if they can't, they make a work order for me.

THIS is what the HELPDESK sent me. i'm not yelling at the user, i EXPECT this sort of thing from the user, i'm yelling at the HELPDESK!

WHY they didn't inform the unit that this thing was beyond hope escapes me...

hey now, i've got a dual xeon 550 at home, running a 450 gig raid 5 :)

[abstrak-tokatl.livejournal.com]

let me know when they start selling them. my mother needs a type machine!

[canray.livejournal.com]

"Please do any standard maintenance on PC."

OK, on a PC that old, Standard Maintenance would requite a complete rebuild of the system. Hardware rebulid.

They'll have to allow it in the budget. Oh? No budget for it? Then no Standard Maintenance for you.

Sub-Standard Maintenance can be performed as well. No guarentee that it will function afterwards, however.

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

it'd cost less and take far less time to turn it into an herb garden

[jecook]

::hands over the booze::

I managed to dump everything under 200 Mhz at the last place I was at. Hell, one of the machines was a freaking AT chassis fer christ's sake!

And yeah, the Hell Desk needs to be beaten with that machine. Or forced to use it. Or both. ::cackle::

And here I'm thinking some of our older Celeron systems running XP with a quarter gig at work are slow...

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

nothing like a lil perspective eh ;)

these things DO have one advantage.

they dont have fans on the cpu heatsinks.

... dont need em...

[110billion.livejournal.com]

I'm just pissed that in the "Networking" classes we're doing, we've gotta learn about AT mobos. Seriously, what are we living in? 1990?

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

NOW you know why... chances are, the company you go to work for will be running it's network on these things...

[plutherus.livejournal.com]

Why?? For the love of all that's holy WHY would any company still have one of these.

OK - here's how old this thing is: I help run a non-profit organization (http://www.gwob.org) that takes old computers and refurbishes them to set them up in schools, orphanages, etc., in technologically developing areas (that's PC for "third-world countries"), and WE don't take systems that old.

Point that out next time someone asks you for one of these. Somewhere in Somalia there is an orphanage. And in that orphanage, there lives a six-year-old boy. And that child, who only has electricity for two hours a day, and has to walk a mile to the well to get drinking water, has a better computer than you.

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

BWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHYAH

i may have to post this...

[trixtah.livejournal.com]

Hah, my PDA has more oomph than that POS. Note to Helpdesk: "Time for a decent burial".

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

i pulled a compaq prolinea out of a medroom today. A COMPAQ PROLINEA 5100 (90mhz, 16 meg ram).

i asked the users if they wanted to have a small ceremony before i took it away

[gholam.livejournal.com]

You know that Intel still sells 80386 CPUs for embedded applications?

Back to the point, it all depends on what it's running. I got one of those last week with a failed hard drive - Pentium 133MHz, 32MB RAM, 3.5" FDD, in a Baby-AT chassis. Replaced the drive, reinstalled Win98SE, Novell client, hooked it up to equally ancient NetWare 4.11 server, and it's running fine. Used for accessing some sort of database in an auto repair shop.

If all you need from the system is a terminal, and the terminal uses a commonly supported protocol, you can load something like FeatherLinux on it and be fine.

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

that's basically how they've been managing to last this long, however we moved to a AJAX webmail client (zimbra... *shiver*) about 6 months ago or more.

no one thought to check on the requirements of this just out of beta and not tried and tested web 2.0 boondoggle. they only list xp sp2 as being officially supported.

O_o