nevermind!

[ebtb.livejournal.com]

I wish I could just answer with "nevermind" sometimes. We have client and enterprise versions of our software, so when 1d10ts call, I ask if they are using the consumer or Exchange version or the consumer or Enterprise version, depending on the product. When they don't know the difference, you know they have the consumer version, but they won't let it go. When they stammer with "uhhh.. what do you mean by exchange? I have a dell..." it's consumer. End of story.

But, nooooooooooooo! They start asking questions about the differences between the two because they think the corporate versions are better, when they're not - they just manage many users.  They think it catches more spam or spyware and they wanna know how much it is and I have to tell them that they lack an exchange server or a server all together and can't run it and then they wanna know where to get an exchange server 'cause it sounds cool or something. argh. Just nevermind!

When I try to take the easy way out and tell them there are no differences, they get angry and say "THEN WHY DO YOU ASK WHICH VERSION I'M RUNNING?!"

I just can't win.

Comments

[forge.livejournal.com]

"If you don't have it, it doesn't effect you so let's (insert segway into troubleshooting)."

always works for me and they never bring it up again. *shrugg*

[ravenshrinkery.livejournal.com]

I always handled questions like this with a "You would know if this applied to you". If they persist, out comes technobabble. I would ensure they were thoroughly confused into submission and not asking any more stupid questions. Countless hours of frustration have been saved through this strategy.

[harry-whodunnit.livejournal.com]

I wish my users could be cowed by technobabble. When they ask a question and don't understand the answer, they just switch off and repeat the question when I stop talking.

As many times as it takes, to crush my spirit.

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

"They do pretty much the same thing, but the interfaces are a little different, so I need to know which directions to use."

...might work for you?

[major-error.livejournal.com]

"One costs at least ten arms, sixteen legs, your first- & second- born, and a good administrator to run properly. The other costs considerably less."

Might work as well.

[solradia.livejournal.com]

I use the "It's just for documentation purposes."

[jjjiii]

Rather than clue them into the fact that there are different product tiers, just have them go into the Help menu and get the About Application... info, and read what's there to you. That way you can identify the version without getting into those sorts of dead-end conversations.

[notthebuddha.livejournal.com]

"Where's Help?"

"Do I left-click it or right-click it?"

"It sez, 'this product is licenseed to...'"

[the-s-guy.livejournal.com]

"The other version is sold on a per-CPU basis, costs roughly ten thousand dollars more, and requires a computer the size of Nebraska."