No means no!

[ebtb.livejournal.com]

Me:  Thank you for calling ________ tech support. This is MB, how may I help you?

Luser: Yeah, I need help with Product X - it's giving me a runtime error.

Me: I see. Product X has been aquired by _______ Software Inc. as of July 10th and is now supported by them. Their tech support can be reached at the toll free number 800-555-5555.

Luser: What?! So you're not gonna help one of your customers who purchased this product?! I have all your other software!

Me: I apologize for the inconvenience, sir, however while we support those other products we no longer support Product X. _____ Software Inc. is providing free tech support for current subscribers such as yourself.

Luser: Well, that's just bullshit. I know you have supported it before so why can't you just help me?

Me:  Because our company no longer receives revenue from that product and therefore cannot pay technicians to support it. Do you see what I am saying?

Luser: *sighs* In the time you took explaining this to me, you could have already solved my problem!

Me: *rolls her eyes* I understand your point, however _______ Software Inc. has made changes to the program that I am not trained on. Therefore, they will be able to better assist you.

Luser:  *sighs* Whatever. You should have notified your current users so I could have avoided all of this. Thanks for wasting my time. *hangs up on me*

Another satified customer! *puts another tally mark on the whiteboard behind me*