Who are you? WHERE ARE YOU?

[gilmoure.livejournal.com]

Me: Help Desk. Gilmoure Speak-

EB: Need java!

Me: What is your name?

EB: EB. I need Java.

Me: What seems to be the probelm?

EB: I. Need. Java. It's for a web course.

Me: What course are you taking?

EB: It's XYZ123. Says I need java.

Me: Can I remote in?

EB: Yes.

Me: Hmmm...Can't connect. Are you on abc123 desktop computer?

EB: No, I'm in the lab.

Me: What is the number of the computer you're on? (trying to hide the sounds of me eating my computer speaker, to keep from grinding my teeth in rage!)

EB: Oh yeah, I guess you need that.


And it went downhill from there. Why do users think we have super magic happy telepathy beany hats on and a magic wand stuffed up our ass that we can wave to make everything in the user's world sparkly and shiney? We have almost 20,000 computers here. If you're not in your office, let me know!

Comments

[flainn.livejournal.com]

You mean no one gave you a super magic happy telepathy beanie hat or a magic wand?

Seriously, though, I think a lot of users think that since IT people have the ability to get into just about everything (root passwords and whatnot) that we also have the ability to magically divine where a user is currently located, what the user is wearing, etc. Sometimes such an assumption isn't that far wrong.

[gilmoure.livejournal.com]

True. Once I had luser's name, I started a search for current log ons. Seeing as how he was in a lab, with it's own network, not connected to the main network, I only saw his desktop machine. Gah!

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

A "Goodly Number" of the people I support work their shifts in special rooms. They may be in this room one day, and that room another. (probably 70+ of these rooms, 20+ different printers) I just love it when the tickets come in for them... "computer has email problem" or "printer jammed"... and the only contact info is the default location where their phone (VM only) is located.

[omg-teh-funnay.livejournal.com]

Sounds like your help desk needs a visit from the LART Fairy

I hate it when we get tickets in where Level1 has done a horrid job of documenting.

Though, it DOES make for some good entries on my Wall Of Shame

[hisamishness.livejournal.com]

Yeah...
Looking at one right now.

"1) Internet is not working
2) Quicktime no longer playing embedded clips"

And the real issues?

1) The aim/aol mail webpage wil not load.
2) problems with a QT clip on thier desktop.

[sensrhps.livejournal.com]

"Need java!"

"Go to starbucks"

*hang up*