techrecovery | ...and people wonder why I drink... (Reply)

First ticket of the day: (an exact quote, minus confidential info)

Replace the power circuit on users %network% Client

o-O

Checking the ticket info, I see he emailed in the info:

Good Afternoon Helpdesk,
As you all have an appropriate moment, please just stop by to replace the power circuit on my %network% client. If I am not in my office, please just see my colleagues a, b, or c.

very respectfully, the asstard

Hm. No help there. So I call this luser. What is his problem?

He's having problems archiving his email. Therefore, he feels he doesn't have a large enough network share. He wants to have several gigs. (Avg. share is 25MB)

And no, he doesn't want to try and troubleshoot the actual problem, thankyouverymuch.

Fighting the urge to connect his workstation to building mains power, I advise this clown to put in the appropriate request to the appropriate people. Since they have been on our case about "Customer service" and "Never tell them 'No'", I restrain myself from telling this person that there is a better chance of my getting to be the middle of an Alyson Hannigan/Amber Benson sandwich than there is of his getting One gig of network share, let alone several.

::reaches for Tums::

Please %deity%, let that be the biggest id-10t for the day.

(x-posted to my personal LJ)