(no subject)

[normal1.livejournal.com]

Okay, if someone elses doubts my troubleshooting steps I swear I will hang up the phone.

Me: "Okay, will you kindly plug the ethernet cable directly into the back of your computer please?"
Starfish: "Okay one moment.."
** One minute later **
Starfish: "Are you sure its supposed to go there?"
Me: *silence* ".... Yes"
** Another minute later **
Starfish: "And that goes into the back of the white thing?"
Me: "Yes, there will only be one place where it can fit"
** Another minute later **
Starfish: "This only fits into the back of the modem!"
Me: *thinks to self* This bitch is stupid.
Me: "Is there someone in the home that can help you find it?"
Starfish: "Look buddy, I pay $18 dollars a month (this is for cable internet mind you) for this service and I can't get online!"
Me: "*silence* - I'm not debating your charges, I'm trying to help you get the cable where its supposed to go"
Starfish: "Done!"
Me: "Okay.. lets go ahead and try the internet - go to www.yahoo.com"
Starfish: "let's see.. three Ws and what else?"

Oh my god.. once we get on the internet she starts asking me how to use the internet. I swear on all that is good and holy this was the worst call to-date, I almost yelled at her hill-billy ass. I swear people should take a test to determine their ability to safely surf the web before getting ANY type of internet service.
** head slammed against desk **

Comments

[methedras.livejournal.com]

Hahaha... that's a pretty common phone call you got right there.

[residentgeek.livejournal.com]

She'll be back later claiming she can't get her email on her spyware and virus infested computer...

[jjjiii]

I have a canned response for this sort of thing: "Ma'am, that's a training issue, not a support issue." Support is for when something is broken or not working right. If it's working right, but you don't know how to use it, it's training. If I'm feeling charitable, I'll give them a recommendation for where they can go for training. I might even do it myself (on my own time for pay) if they ask, aren't terminally clueless, and seem reasonable and appreciative of good help.

[ladynisa.livejournal.com]

yeah, i've had that call . . .

its worse when they have such a hick accent that you have to bite back your laughter the whole call though. makes it very hard to speak smoothly.

[normal1.livejournal.com]

I completely agree.. however, being stupid and uneducated isnt an excuse to be an ass.

[valiskeogh.livejournal.com]

HEY THERE!
i'm looking through old posts in tech_support, looking for stories
that i'd like included on http://www.helpdeskhell.com . i've found your's terribly
amusing, can i include it on the "clueless luser pages" of the site?

please respond if yes, no response necessary if no.

thanks for your help!

valis